Tear In My Heart ✔️

XIX. Moments Like This (edited)

^listen to this song (What A Heavenly Way To Die by Troye Sivan) because it really captures the feel of this chapter. Enjoy!!

I didn't get a wink of sleep last night. I refused to close my eyes in fear that the monster disguised as Madison's father would come back in the dark to try to finish what he'd started. But that didn't happen, thankfully. Unfortunately, that didn't stop Madison's relentless nightmares or the haunting tears that continuously streamed down his battered face in the night. One of his nightmares got to the point that he was yelling, borderline screaming for his father to stop. I'd never forget the fear I felt as tears endlessly fell down his face; I woke him up as fast as I could, but the psychological damage had long been done. He'd opened his eyes and frantically looked around as if he didn't know where he was, his breathing erratic and muscles tense. Then his eyes landed on me. I held him close and let him cry until he'd cried himself back to sleep. And I'd been holding onto him ever since.

I glanced at the clock as I gently combed my fingers through his hair. When I did that, it seemed to soothe his mind, as if his subconscious knew he was safe with me, even when he was asleep. It was a bit past nine. I knew Madison hated starting the day late, but the way he looked when he was sleeping, calm and serene, made me stop. He looked like an angel. He was an angel. My angel, handcrafted and sent to me by God Himself.

I found myself fluttering my eyes closed as I held Madison tighter, preparing my mind and heart for something I hadn't done in a while. "Hey, God," I softly said, careful not to wake Madison up. "I know I haven't talked to You in a while, not since all this drama has started, and I'm sorry. That's when I should've been talking to You the most. It's just...I don't know. My church says that You hate me but I don't think You do. I know You don't because if You did, why make me that way? I mean, the Bible even says that You don't make mistakes and love each and every one of us. Your love is unconditional, so why would who I love change that? I just...I wish the church understood." I took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm...I'm coming to You in prayers that You'll protect the one I love from the evil that is his father. Madison is just so amazing and nice and kind-hearted and doesn't deserve any of this pain. And I know there's a reason that You're doing this that we don't understand yet, but please...please protect him for me. I love him so much that it hurts and it kills me to see him hurt like this. Thank You for all that You've done, all that You're doing, and all You're going to do, and in Your son Jesus' name, amen," I softly concluded as I opened my eyes. It felt good to get everything out and confide in my faith. I felt comforted in an indescribable, but good way.

My attention returned to the sleeping angel in my arms, a small grin growing on my lips before I gently started bombarding him with gentle kisses the way he'd done me a mere day ago. "Baby," I whispered as I kissed his cheek. "Baby, it's time to wake up..." He merely stirred, but didn't move much. I placed another gentle kiss on his nose. "Madison, wake up, amore mio (my love)."

His eyes slowly fluttered open, revealing his beautiful eyes, though my heart pulled at the sight of his painful-looking black eye. It'd swelled even more last night to the point his eye was barely halfway open. "I look that bad, huh?" Madison said with a humorless laugh, his voice scratchy and weak, but a wince followed soon after as he gently cradled his rib. I carefully pulled back the covers and saw that his chest wounds had also become worse in the night.

"Are you sure you don't want to go to the hospital, Madison? We could make sure you're okay and get your sorry excuse for a father arrested."

Madison instantly shook his head as he slowly sat himself to a sitting position, biting his bottom lip to hold back a wince. "No, Noah. I don't want to go to the hospital or press charges or anything it's just...thanks babe, but I'm fine. I promise, just a bit sore that's all."