As Time Goes On - A SebaCiel Story

Chapter 53: Therapy

"Eliza, darling, can you please tell us what went on when you were at home?"

This is how it's been since that night. My therapy sessions becoming mother and daughter sessions.

I have become far too adapted to being recognised as Eliza and Astre's Mother.

"I'm here to comfort you, whatever you need I will provide, alright? If you feel uncomfortable about anything, you can seek comfort from me. Though I must warn you that I will also be sharing my experiences within this session too. Experiences that are incredibly similar to your own, so if you begin to feel upset please tell me. I don't want to make you cry, love."

The little girl chooses to sit on my lap with my arms crossed over her, my hands in hers as her head rests on my shoulder.

"I know. I promise that I will tell you if I get upset, Mama."

"Good. Where should we begin?" Sebastian asks

"Perhaps from your first memory of things going on?"

"Yeah, that's a good idea." She chimes in, earning a little squeeze in my arms. "Uhh...I was really young when I first saw them fighting."

"I watched them when I was meant to be sleeping one night. The scumbag came home with a smudge of lipstick on his collar, his trousers unzipped and a brown bag with a full bottle of rather expensive wine. Our old mother, Amelia, noticed this. They got into an argument in which the scumbag became so furious that he punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious. That moment was when his true nature revealed itself. Maybe he was doing this to her before I was conceived but... he "played" with her body after she wouldn't respond...and I was forced to watch in horror as she began to bleed...I-"

Tears fall from her beautiful emerald eyes as her grip on me tightens, causing Sebastian's concern to grow with every word of it.

"Lets...Lets move on...I was eight years old when he first touched me. He said I was pretty, that I was such an angel...and that pretty little angels do what their "Daddy" tell them no matter the consequences. That they don't tell secrets, or they go to Hell. I was frightened by the thought of getting into trouble, very frightened, and so I endured it as took advantage of me. Over and over and over... I would start bleeding halfway through but he wouldn't stop...I begged...I pleaded and I prayed but no one would ever answer those prayers.

It took him two years of constant abuse to tell me that he 'loved' me like he loved his wife. That we could run away together...I finally told her what he was doing...to both of us and she didn't care...she only cared that he was in love with me. She hit me then and there. Jealous. Envious...

When she asked him about his affair, he imploded...murdered her with a kitchen knife and...as punishment...he cut me with the knife bathed in the blood of the woman who took care of me first.....Mama I don't think this is a good idea for you." She states calmly, her face turning expressionless with only the teardrops to show her torment.

"Why, my dear?"

"Because you're crying..."

"I'm crying because it hurts to hear you go through what you have as ten year old girl. As I went through something very similar at your age."

"You did?"

"I did, and it was brutal."

"Ciel, would you like to explain?"

"Uh...okay. On my tenth birthday my parents were murdered, my home set on fire and I was kidnapped by Satanic cultists. I was beaten, burned, stabbed, starved and...used for the pleasure of everyone in the cult. Their sacrificial lamb... and all I could do was scream...I was kept there for just over a month and I realised early on that...the meat they had served me was made out of the previous child sacrifices that stared blankly in the cage with me. It was like I was the only one left alive."

"Oh my God...Mama, I'm so sorry." 

"It's alright sweetheart, it will always be. Because...whenever I begin to remember what they had done, I tell myself the one thing that matters most. The thing that keeps me going.

I survived for a reason."