Not Like This (Stucky AU)

CHAPTER TWO

BUCKY'S POV

Three weeks have passed since I moved back home, it's has been a little weird settling into a stable life after a hectic year and a half. Almost every night I have a night terrors and one of my parents have to sit with me until I've calmed down and fall back asleep. Steve visits everyday and takes me to see his mum who is a therapist, though I don't really talk to her but she doesn't seem to mind, she tells me what Steve has been up to since I left and that she has never judged me for punching her son.
I'm going back to school today, though only Steve and his mum think I'm ready, my family wants me to be sure but I've already done all the necessary tests to see if I'll be put back a grade. Thankfully, I'm going to be in 11th grade like I'm supposed to when school starts today. I'm slightly terrified because people will be intimidated by my arm and question where I've been for so long but Steve, Natasha, Clint and Bruce have all promised to watch out for me.
The second my alarm goes off, I slam my right hand down on the button to shut the darn thing off. A groan slips from my mouth as I slowly push myself up and look around my room. My single bed is tucked in the far corner from the bedroom door, my wardrobe next to the door, a small desk next to my bed that is cluttered with things I haven't touched and my dresser facing my bed next to my desk, also littered with items. My three skateboards hang along the wall above my bed and my acoustic guitar between my desk and dresser. The room is a little musty smelling but it smells like home and I love it.
"Damn shoulder." I grumble, rubbing it as I get out of bed.
After grabbing some clean clothes, I head to the bathroom between mine and my brother's room. I turn the knob on the wall after placing my clothes by the sink. My shower doesn't last long but I lose time by staring at my shoulder in the mirror with just a towel around my waist. My hair is long and dark and makes the dark circles under my eyes worse than they really are. There's scarring where the skin meets metal because I scratched at it and tried to rip it off but was unable.
"Oh, shoot, I'm sorry - what happened?" I turn to see my youngest brother, Jay standing in the doorway. I hadn't even realised that I didn't lock the door. I stare at him, not sure what to say if I should say anything. "Th-the scars."
I stare at him for a little longer before turning back to the mirror and lightly tracing the scars. I barely even notice Jay had left until I hear the soft click of the door closing. Sighing heavily, I dry my body the best I can and get into my clothes which consists of loose, faded blue jeans, a red long sleeved shirt and a black army jacket.
"Hey sweetie," My mum greets cheerfully, pecking me on the cheek while I'm tying my boots. "Are you going to eat this morning?"
"I'll have a bit of toast." It's not much but the words put a smile on her face as she and dad run about the kitchen getting everything ready for everyone for the first day back at school.
"Jamie," Dawn wanders over and sits on my lap. I kiss her hair and give her a hug, she's the only one who's been able to do this sort of thing, I freak out with everyone else. "Can I braid some hair?"
"Yes, you can." I chuckle at the six year old.
As the little munchkin braids my hair out of my face, I nibble on the toast my mum hands me. The whole way to school, mum and dad ask me constantly if I'm sure I want to go back so soon and that it's okay to wait but I can't just sit around at home in my own thoughts. That's not good for anyone.
"Hey Steve, guys." I nod towards Clint, Nat and Bruce but stick close to Steve. They greeted me at the school gates and I'm finally starting to feel nervous about all of this.
None of them ask if I'm ready to do this, we all just head to the front office to get my timetable. All four of them are in at least one of my classes, and we're all in the same English and Gym class. We have English first, and Gym last with a bunch of classes between. We make our way to English before the bell and take a seat near the back of the class and I pick at the glove covering my left hand. The moment the bell rings and people flood in, I move lower in my seat to try and hide. I feel like everyone is staring at me, they probably aren't but it feels like it and I can't stop the thoughts from invading my head.
"I don't think I can do this, Stevie." I whisper, beginning to feel lightheaded as Mrs Heartluck walks in. "Everyone's staring."
"No, they aren't, you're okay Bucky." Steve assures me and I just believe he's right when Mrs Heartluck starts greeting the class.
My heart drops into my stomach and twists in knots when she tells everyone to introduce themselves along with two things about us. She makes the front row start and slowly works it's round until me. I stand shakily after Steve sits down and try to breathe but find it difficult and I hear people snicker. They stop after a look from Natasha though, she is terrifying.
"My name is James," I train my eyes on Steve who gives me a thumbs up to encourage me. "I got back from DC three weeks ago, and I have a metal arm that can smash concrete."
Probably shouldn't have said hat by the looks on people's faces but it just kind of slipped out. I quickly sit down and do all I can not to throw myself out the closest window which is on the second floor.
The only reason I feel better is because when Natasha stands up, she says she likes ballet and punching people in the face, then Clint stands up and says he likes archery and shooting people in the butt. They both grin at me when they say those things. Bruce however, is a little shy and mumbles about science and something about him having anger issues.
It's nice to know they have my back, and they aren't like Rumlow so I know they won't hurt me like he did.