You'll be the Death of Me

Chapter 76

Today was going to be a very long day. He knew that not only by the feeling in his gut but by the way Graces seemed to fret over him this morning before he left, exceptionally early in case Harry checked his map, to spend time in the greenhouse. She had followed him around the little apartment like a lost puppy: biting her lip, playing with a string of hair, fiddling with this vase of flowers and that. And gods, he had no idea she kept that much chocolate stashed away. He doubted she was going to even eat breakfast after all those chocolate frogs.

Still, if he was honest he very much appreciated her worries. It was odd. He knew she didn't love him, but he felt loved. It was like a small match had been lit inside his heart and it warmed his chest and he carried it with him through the day. He felt protected in a way. When he punched Harry and knew in that instant he may have lost all his friends, he had this blinding comfort that he would have Graces. That it didn't matter because she was going to be there. When she had walked out last night the match had flickered, but when she came back and confessed she had never left it blazed that much brighter.

He thought about the way she looked at his bruised and cut up face this morning. Nobody ever looked at him that way. He thought of the beginning of the year when Draco had continuously beat the pulp out of him and Hermione had helped him heal a few times. All those times Hermione had looked at him with a mix of pity and strong affection, he knew that she loved him on a platonic level, but it was nothing like the way Graces looked at him.

He touched the cut on his lip absently. She had wanted to heal him so badly, but he wouldn't let her. He had too much respect for Professor McGonagall to find a loophole to her rule of not being allowed to go to the infirmary. She wanted Harry and Draco to heal the muggle way and he was not about to defy her. The only thing he had allowed the blonde to do was somewhat treat his cut lip.

He had reopened the wound while brushing his teeth. A sharp hiss of pain and a slight trickle of blood had escaped him. He had just began dabbing the cut with a wash cloth and some water, knowing Graces eyes were on him, when she quietly took the washcloth away. Her hand lingering on his arm as she perched herself onto the bathroom counter, so she was nearly eye level with him.

She had been so gentle. Taking his place dabbing the wound, rummaging through her Quidditch emergency bag and finding some disinfectant salve she had. The salve stung, but he didn't notice much. He was too preoccupied watching her lips as after each small dab she blew softly on his wound before giving the area the most tender kiss.

When each cut had been tended to she looked up at him with such affection and remorse that he was left breathless, hovering in a state where the rest of the world didn't exist, just the two of them. He loved her and he didn't understand how she could look at him like that and make him feel the way he did, when she didn't feel the same. He didn't feel like this was in his head. Neville sighed and wished he had a pensieve to clear his head. It was currently a bloody mess. He didn't know what to think or what to feel. One minute he felt fine and loved despite her words and the next his heart felt like it was falling to his feet, because she didn't love him.

He turned the corner to enter the great hall when a familiar polished voice stopped him.

"Good morning," Draco greeted, leaving Neville to marvel that something pleasant towards him could actually come out of that mouth.

Draco raised an eyebrow at his silence which Neville hurriedly amended with an apology and an awkward good morning back. This seemed to satisfy Draco and the blonde stood there beside him in his proper suit and good breeding, waiting for people to pass them by. It was a futile wait. The whole student body seemed to slow their pace at the site of Draco and him standing together. Neville did his best not to look as uncomfortable as he felt, but judging by Draco's amusement he was doing a very poor job.