twenty-three

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*7 months later*

Walking into the crowded party Jin swiftly grinned. It looked exactly like home, at least what he considered his new home to be. A crowed party, one where he didn't know anyone.

One where he could blend perfectly in, insignificant to everyone around him. Already a little buzzed, he immediately grabbed a drink from the table. And then leaning against the wall he just drank.

What else was he supposed to do with his life?

As he drank his eyes shifted, around the room. But somehow in the end his eyes came to land on a couple, a gay couple to be exact.

The two males weren't the best looking but there was a certain shine in their eyes when they looked at each other that just added a certain beauty to them.

His throat clogged, as he felt that stupid emotion overwhelm him again. He was such a damn fool, still pining over that man.

He really didn't feel in the mood for a party anymore, heading up the stairs of the creaky house. He entered one of the guest rooms, and plopped his body right onto the bed.

He wondered who's house this even was, what was he doing with his life? Spending his nights in a strangers home?

He squeezed his eyes shut, and rolled over to the side. He tried to fall asleep but memories just drifted across his mind. Memories of a certain night to be exact.

7 months ago

'Jin looked at the little kid and sighed he sure looked adorable a bit like Namjoon. They were cousins after all, but Jin could already see this kid getting into some trouble. He ruffled the kids hair, and smiled softly. He was going to grow up and break some hearts for sure.

Namjoon had just gone on a small walk and he'd promised he'd be back in no time. Jin had just smiled and promised to take care of Namjoon's cousin until he was back.

Not knowing how else to entertain the kid, Jin just opened the T.V. and they settled on watching some type of dance completion.

The kid did sure seem to love dance. Sitting on the couch the two had watched the show engrossed for a couple of hours. But then the kid had started to get worried.

It was dark, dark as fuck. It was almost 12, which was much too dark to walk anyways. So the worried kid had tried to call Namjoon. But then Namjoon hadn't answered.

And so he called again and again, and Jin had just ingored him still focused on the show. But then the kid had started whimpering leaving no choice but for Jin to bring his attention to him.

So then Jin had tried to call Namjoon, repeatedly and he never answered. Now Jin was starting to get worried, no one ever walked this late. It was almost 1 now, Namjoon could have gotten kidnapped or something.

So then naturally Jin started predicting what could have happened. Bad things. Stupid things, irrational and paranoid things. And that didn't help, it just created a pool of anxiety in his stomach.

Then Namjoon's stupid cousin had started crying. At that point Jin just couldn't take it. What if something had happened to Namjoon? How was he ever supposed to live without Namjoon?

Sure their relationship was at it's weirdest, Namjoon knew that Jin loved him. Yet Namjoon still stuck by him, sticking to that foolish promise where he'd said he'd help Jin get over it.

But Jin didn't want to get over it, not a single thing in him wanted to stop liking Namjoon. He didn't even bother to try to move on, he just enjoyed the moments he got to spend with Namjoon.

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