I've gone so far down hill there's no way in hell I'll ever reach the top again,
I keep quoting song lyrics in my captions,
Like i think someone will read them and understand,
That they mean more to me than just words,
But no one cares how you're doing,
And that's just life,
As I type this I stare at the four pills on my counter top,
That I think I might just pop,
And they sit unsettlingly close next to the shiny object,
That seems to find its way back into my life over and over again,
I say that she's my best friend,
But three years of sneaking into the medicine cabinet at night and taking apart my razors,
Starts to make me wonder if my best friend is just my own self demise and self destruction,
It's what I seem to do best,
And I guess I write this here because I'm scared I won't wake up tomorrow morning,
Or after this I'm going to dissolve into nothingness,
But it's how it is,
I know I'll do it either way,
Because this pain has become to strong for me to take,
And no I'm not trying to die,
I'm just trying to not feel,
And I know that's not right,
He makes me go insane,
I'm trapped in my own mind,
And I can't stop thinking about her,
So why should I even try.
