Trip Hazard

Please, No Paparazzi

Noah

"Ow, quit that will you?" I swat away the hand that's prodding my face.

"But damn, Noah, your face is messed up!" The hand reappears, this time at my wrist, looking at the ring of bruises. "And your hands, too!"

"You should see the other guy," I reply, cool, blasé. Worlds away from yesterday.

What he doesn't know won't hurt him. Even so, better to move on the conversation before I get caught in my own lie.

"C'mon, we've spent almost all this period with you just gawking at my face. You've only just dared to say something. We need to get some work done, I'm your tutor for a reason, Jimmy."

Jimmy just pouts.

"No need to be so damn condescending, we're in the same year, or had you forgotten that?"

He crosses his arms and raises both eyebrows at me. It's not a good look for him. I'm hardly one to talk, but no one would feel even moderately threatened by him. Including me. I smack the piece of paper in front of him with a ruler. He jumps.

"Fine then, Einstein, what answer did you get for 4a?"

"14,000." He utters in complete confidence. He manages to raise one of his eyebrows even further in a challenge to me, all while smiling smugly. I look down at my answer sheet.

"Yeah, so I got 8.65."

That wiped the smirk off Jimmy's face pretty fast. He looks down at the paper, back up at me, then back down at the paper. I hide the red marking pen I had in my hand under the table. No need to kick a man while he's down. And his confidence is on the floor as it is.

"What? But...how? No, you must be wrong...but?"

I skim over what he's done. It's beyond believably awful. It's what I imagine a five year old would do if someone passed them a triangle and a crayon. I look up, and sigh exasperatedly.

"Do you even know Pythagoras?"

"Not personally, is he in our year?"

If it wasn't for all the bruises on my head, I would smash my head on the table. This kid is insufferable. No wonder Elijah passed him off to me to tutor. Six weeks of tutoring and he still doesn't know who Pythagoras is. I don't know if that says more about him or me. I only took the job because of the money, but I'd pay to pull me out of this misery to be honest.

"Come on, try it again."

He descends into muttering, pointing at different parts of his work and crossing through several sections. I sigh and take a look at my watch. I now need to reteach him the last forty minutes' worth of work, in the five minutes before next lesson. If someone with super powers wants to give me their abilities, now is that time.

Although not as climatic as yesterday, today is proving to be a challenge. I whack the ruler on the table again out of pure frustration. Unfortunately, Jimmy's hand is in the way. I don't apologize. He deserved it for that answer.

Surprising neither of us, he still doesn't get it when we both walk out the door.

"See ya, Noah. Take me with you next time you're beating someone up!"

He punches the air as he starts to jog down the corridor. But multitasking was a risk because as he spins he has to grab a nearby sophomore just to not fall down. The sophomore does not appreciate it, so Jimmy has to sprint away before he gets punched. Never a quiet moment with McKibble.

"You told him you beat someone up?" Lachlan bursts into laughter, clutching the door frame for support.

I close my eyes. Not even out the door and one of my friends is waiting for me, making an annoying remark. I know they have Drunk Noah watch, but now? I hardly think I'm in any danger in Buckingham. No teacher would let anything like blood stain the floor. Besides, I'm surprised they sent Lachlan of all people. If someone did attack me, he would laugh solidly before even trying to help. I'm better off alone.