FLAWED

Go Bulldogs!

Friday December 12th

Post #20

By the time school ended, Eric was completely convinced I was avoiding him. During English, I had a meeting with my counselor that ran into the second half of English so I just hung out in the counselor's office until third period. During third period (the trigonometry class we have together) I was donating blood to the school's annual blood drive fundraiser. I went out for lunch with Alison fourth period, and he and I don't have any other classes together for the rest of the day. If I wasn't stuck at my locker trying to get a hold of Melony for the fifteenth time, I wouldn't have ran into him. He was his way to practice before the big game tonight when he just so happened to stop near my locker.

"I'm so glad I ran into you." He said. "I wanted to know if you're still coming to cheer me on tonight."

"I promised that I'd be there, so I'll be there." Even though I declined his invitation to the after party, I did my best to convince him there was no bad blood between us. I was still slightly annoyed with Eric from the "party" last Sunday, but I was making an effort to put it behind me.

I stepped outside letting the breeze push against my white floral dress to see Steven pressed against his shiny silver car. He handed me a single pink rose as he pulled me close and pressed his lips against mine. This time Eric wasn't around and my body told me it was okay to kiss him back. Everything suddenly felt better when I climbed into his car and we headed home.

"We should go out somewhere special tonight." He suggested. "Our last date wasn't so hot and I want to do something special before you leave me for two weeks." Technically, Steven would be leaving me for two weeks since he's spending the entire break with his family in New York.

"I promised Eric I'd go to his game."

He clenched his jaw and tighten his grip on the rubber material enclosing the steering will. "Oh."

Those two letters-that one word planted itself in my head for the entire night. It replayed itself on a loop all throughout my head as Steven's reaction was the only thing on my mind. He didn't say a word to me for the rest of the ride until he kissed me goodbye.

"I feel like a terrible girlfriend." I was use to talking to my mom about my issues but I was new to Emily being around to hear them. "Sarah, you're a wonderful girlfriend. Look, Steven will get over this little bump in the road. Sometimes we have to make decisions that'll put one persons' happiness over someone else's-it's just how life works."

Emily nodded in agreement as my mom styled her yellow hair. "Steven should trust that you and Eric don't have anything going on."

"He doesn't like Eric around me because he knows how Eric feels about me. He should know that he has nothing to worry about but his gut tells him otherwise." I've spent countless nights thinking about Steven's disdain for Eric but hearing myself talk about it only made me feel worse. Because I know how Steven feels about Eric and I continue to associate with him. I know that I'm not obligated to Steven or to anyone for that matter. But wouldn't seeing someone close to you with someone you can't stand get to you too?

We didn't talk much about the subject after Jessie came. Even though she doesn't attend Suncrest High, she decided to get dressed in a dark red oversized sweater, a black skater skirt, and a gray scarf. Her smoky eye shadow look only made her dark bold red lips pop even more.  But what I noticed the most was her dark hair a shade lighter than it was the last time I saw her.

"Did you dye your hair lighter?"

Confused, she turned towards the mirror hanging on the ocean blue living room walls. "No, the dye is fading again. I was meaning to pick up a box of dye but I haven't gotten around to it yet."