Emo Trinity x Reader

Mikey Way x Reader - The Ghost Of You

You tried to explain it to him that evening. Under sobs and tears you told him his dad was gone and would never come home. He did not like that either. He had no real memory of his dad, but there was a photo of him on the board by the fireplace. Also 'never' always sounded so infinite, he did not understand the concept of infinity.

When Manuel was in bed later that night, Gerard told you how it happened. Mikey had been shot on a beach in Normandy. Ray had been there too. He was the one Mikey wanted to name Manuel after, so he gave his son his friend's second name. You loved the idea since Ray was one of your closest friends as well. Ray had tried to save him, had tried to stop the bleeding but it was no use. If Frank had not stopped Gerard from running to his little brother, he would be dead now too.

You sat at the kitchen table for a long time, the sound of your sobbing mixing with the storm outside and the cracking of the fire in the fireplace. It felt like your world was breaking apart. You had never been in so much pain and you would love to just curl into a ball and never be talked to again. Or run away, run away to a place where no one knew you and your story, where you could forget.

But then again you did not want to forget. Mikey had been the man you had loved with all your heart, the man you still loved. And you had a responsibility to look after your son. One day he would start asking questions and then you needed to be ready to tell him about the amazing person his father had been. But it was so hard to stay strong, so hard to get through a day without wanting to give up on everything.

~*~

After you had sat at Gerard's bedside for some time, you walked into the kitchen. It would be time for breakfast soon, so you prepared tea and pancakes. After that was done, you sat in the kitchen and looked outside. The sun was just coming up, drops of dew were lined along blades of grass and reflected the light like millions of diamonds. You imagined a man walk up the gravel path, emerging from the fog, his jacket swung over his shoulder. You imagined he would come closer and you would recognize him as the man you loved, that you would jump up and storm outside, hug him, kiss him, but you were torn out of your fantasy by the taps of tiny feet on the floor. You looked up and smiled tiredly at Manuel who walked into the kitchen. He climbed up on the chair next to you and placed his tiny hand on yours. It always fascinated you, how this small kid understood you were hurting. For a while you sat there until Gerard came into the kitchen as well and you started breakfast.

It was early afternoon. The humming of your sewing machine was drowning out all the other sounds, apart from the happy squealing of Manuel who was playing with the dogs in front of the house. Your hands skillfully guided fabric under the needle. This was your job, you repaired clothes for money. You did not make much, especially not since the war, but it was enough to get your family through life.

Suddenly Manuel grew quiet outside. You thought nothing of it, maybe he had decided to play somewhere else. But then the dogs started to whimper and squeal. This made you look up from your work. You stopped the machine and looked out of the window, but you could not spot the animals or your son from here. A feeling of uneasiness rose in your stomach and you got up, walking through the kitchen, the living room until you reached the hallway. When you opened the door, warm wind fanned over your face, filled with the smell of thousands of flowers. It was a perfect day, yet a shiver ran down your spine as you saw a man stand on the path to the house. You could not see his face, but he seemed to talk to Manuel who stood in front of him. The dogs were pressing themselves against the man's legs, whimpering and waging their tails.

"Hey!" You stepped outside, heading over to the person who had invaded your garden.

Maybe it was a side effect of always living alone as a woman on the countryside, but you were always suspicious of men who you did not know. The man turned around and you froze in your tracks. His hair was longer than you remembered it, his eyes the same, perfect hazel as his brother's. Glasses rested on his nose, not the same ones you knew, but it did not keep you from recognizing him. You could not move. He was dead, Gerard had seen him dying. There was no way in hell that he was actually here, standing in your garden, talking to the son he had not seen grow up. A smile spread over his face, soft and warm, as he saw you. He turned around more, and was about to walk over to you, when a strangled cry came from the house and a figure stormed past you.

Gerard flung the arms around his brother, pulling him into a bone crushing hug. Mikey laughed awkwardly, patting his brother's back, but holding him close, his eyes still fixed on you. You did not dare to move. What if this was just a dream, a hallucination? What if you moved and this perfect picture in front of you vanished forever? But what if this was real?

When Gerard pulled away from Mikey, he turned to look at you expectantly. You were still staring at Mikey and so was Manuel who seemed to be thinking really hard.

"How?" Gerard's voice was quiet but clear.

"A farmer found me on the beach," Mikey still could not take his eyes of you. "Was more dead than alive, and he helped me."

And suddenly you were able to move. At first slowly, but then you ran over to Mikey. He met you halfway, wrapping his arms around you, lifting you up and kissing you hard on the mouth. You noticed he was crying, salty drops running over his cheeks and to your connected lips. The kiss was not gentle, it was full of passion and joy but also fear that this was not real, that maybe you would run away from him, tell him to leave you alone. His arms tightened around your waist, pressing you even closer to him and you ran your fingers over his neck, tangled them into his hair and kissed him back with everything you had. You kissed him with the combined force of all the kisses you had wanted to give him since he had left you, if not even stronger. He slowly set your feet back on the ground, not yet breaking the kiss even though both of you were running out of air. His hands were placed on your hips, pulling them into him. Suddenly tiny, sweaty arms wrapped around one of your legs.

"It's dad," Manuel cheered, hugging both Mikey and you at your legs.

You felt Mikey smile into the kiss before he pulled away, heavily breathing. He bent down and picked Manuel up, who cuddled against his chest.

"Hey buddy," he greeted him. "Long time no see."

"I see you every day, we have a picture," Manuel told his father who smiled. "But I can't hug that." His tiny arms wrapped around Mikey's neck to show him what he meant.

You could feel yourself melting at the perfect picture of your husband holding your son so lovingly. Mikey noticed your smile at the two of them, pulling you back into the hug, this time Manuel between you. You deeply inhaled Mikey's scent, relishing it after you had thought you would never smell it again. Suddenly Mikey let go of your shoulder that he had been hugging. Invitingly he extended his arm to Gerard, who stood next to you, a smile spread over his face, and watched you.

"Gerard..." Mikey mumbled and you copied his gesture, reaching out for his brother.

The smile on Gerard's face grew wider and he stepped forward, wrapping his arms around you and Mikey. You pressed your forehead against your husband's and felt how Manuel was playing with Mikey's hair. You opened your eyes and looked first at your son, then at Mikey who had been looking at you already. You felt complete again, the same way you had felt complete when Mikey and you had stood by Manuel's crib. The nagging feeling of something, someone, missing was finally gone. Mikey smiled at you, so softly and gentle and so full of love, that you thought you were floating in the air.

"I am the happiest man in the world," he whispered.