Emo Trinity x Reader

Gerard Way x Reader - You Don't Love Me

"Whore", "fat cow" and "bitch" were along the more harmless things that were thrown at you. What really hurt was the "He doesn't really love you". It was so easy to believe them.

You had been suffering through these thoughts for almost two months, when you decided that it was enough. By now you had convinced yourself successfully that Gerard had never loved you and that it would be for the best if you broke up with him.

Originally you had hoped it would be a quiet evening where everyone could relax after the concert so you could take Gerard outside and quickly break up with him. But instead the band went to a club to celebrate. You were not sure what exactly they were celebrating, but Gerard and Frank had dragged you along none the less.

The music was loud and made your heart vibrate. Colorful lights danced over the crowd of people who moved to the rhythm of the music. Things had started out calmly. Everyone had sat at the bar. Frank and Ray were drinking beer, Mikey had lemonade, and Gerard and you shared a coke. When the glass was empty Gerard had pulled you to your feet. His newly black dyed hair fell into his eyes and he smiled widely as he led you to the center of the dancefloor. He pulled you close to his body, pressing himself against you and wrapping his arms around your waist. You swayed to the music and after some time he started kissing along your jawline. You closed your eyes and let him. This would be the last time he would do that. You heart shattered at the thought that you would lose Gerard forever, but it was no use if he did not love you. And because you loved him so much, you had to set him free. You ran your fingers through his hair and inhaled his scent. He smelled of sweat and cigarettes but you had always liked that special smell on him. This would probably be the last time you would smell it.

Suddenly Gerard pulled away. His eyes were staring into yours as if to read your thoughts.

"What's the matter, sugar," he asked over the blaring music.

"I'm breaking up with you." You did not even really think about it anymore. These words that you had to say to set him free had burned themselves into your mind over the last weeks and it seemed so natural to say them.

Gerard started at you, his eyes widened in shook. Slowly he shook his head, grabbed your wrist and pulled you through the crowd of people outside.

The air was fresh and the oxygen felt good. Gerard dragged you a few meters away from the exit where no people were listening and turned you around to face him.

"Say that again," he demanded.

"I'm breaking up with you," you repeated. You felt your heart break at the thought that this was it. Two years together with the man you loved ended here, in front of a shitty club. At least there were lots of beautiful girls he could have for himself after he had gotten rid of you.

Gerard still stared at you. You tried not to look at him, but when you did, you saw tears swimming in his eyes.

"Why?" His voice was quiet and shaking.

"I don't deserve you," you began to explain. "You deserve someone who is beautiful and funny and clever. You deserve someone you love."

"But, but..." Gerard helplessly stuttered. He was scared, terrified even. The girl of his dreams, the person he had been in love with since he saw her for the first time, was breaking up with him, because she thought he did not love her.

"It's okay," you whispered. "I understand. I wouldn't want to be with myself either."

"Stop!" Gerard's voice was louder than he had thought. "Stop this bullshit! Stop talking like you're meaning it!" Tears had started rolling down his cheeks. His beautiful hazel eyes were full of sadness and he tightly clung to your hand.

"But I do," you tried to tell him, finally starting to cry as well.

"No you don't. You can't. Because you are so fucking beautiful and so fucking funny, and clever and I love you so fucking much!" Gerard did not care anymore who could hear him. Hell, if he had to climb every skyscraper in NYC and scream it from the rooftops that he loved you, he would do that, if it only meant that you would believe him. "I love you more than I love my own life!"

"Don't say that, Gee, please don't," you pleaded. "You don't have to pity me for loving you."

"I don't, I don't!" he assured you. "I love you and I would die for you, but really I just want to stay with you forever," he sobbed, sinking to his knees, still holding your hand and pressing it against his tearstained cheeks. "Please, (y/n), I love you, I love you so much and if you leave me, I could as well die. Please believe me."

You stared at the man in front of you. His hair was greasy from the sweat of the performance and the fake fog in the club. His face was hot in your hand and his tears dropped off your fingers. But you did not try to pull back. You would have tried to tell yourself that he was acting, but why should he? And how could he react so realistically so fast? Did he really mean it? Did he really love you? Were you really breaking his heart? Suddenly he looked up at you.

"I'm just never gonna let you go," he declared, tightening his grip around your hand. "You'll have to stay with me forever. Until you don't love me anymore... you do love me, do you?"

Quietly you nodded.

"Then I'm not letting go," he told you, slowly getting back up on his feet. "Is that okay?"

Again you nodded and a smile spread over his face.

"Do you believe me, that I love you, and that I won't let you leave me like that?"

"Yap," you murmured, your voice quiet and wet from your own tears.

"Great," Gerard stepped close to you, still tightly holding onto your hand. "If you ever have doubts like that again, you'll let me know, promise?"

"Promise," you answered, finally looking up at him.

His eyes were brighter than usual from crying. His cheeks were wet from the tears and his lips were red and swollen.

"I'm gonna kiss you now," he announced, his eyes softly locked with yours.

"Okay," you agreed.

He leant over to you until his lips were almost touching yours. "Hey," he whispered. "One more thing. I love you so fucking much, I can't even put it into words, okay?"

You wanted to tell him you loved him too, but he had already captured you lips in a soft kiss that said more than a thousand words.