I. Am. Done. [Completed]

Pills

Kit's POV

It has been two days since I got out of the hospital.

I haven't done anything self-harming, not that I could have... When my mom told me she hide all the devices... She did... She did hide everything.

I wanted to... So badly I did... I was... I am... Addicted.

Today I'm supposed to go to the psychiatrist.

But... I don't want to go.

I'm scared.

Or maybe scared is exaggerating, 

I am nervous.

I know that there I am supposed to open up, to tell my problems. But how could I?

I don't know what is happening to me.

I don't know what will happen to me there.

He said he isn't going to push me into doing anything that I'm not comfortable with, but can I trust him in that? We just met.

*

A moment later

*

I am standing in the waiting room now. 

No one else is here, not that I can see anyway. Only one that I saw was the lady in the info-counter. She wasn't much of a talker. She just guided me in one of the rooms and told me to wait Hall there.

I went into the room, the room was numbered 420.

I saw one chair in the middle of the room. I went and sat there.

I took a look around of the room.

It was small, the walls were grey. There was one table, full of office supplies and papers and stuff. One white shelf was in the corner of the room, full of folders, binders and albums. There was another chair in the room, right in front of me. Also a grey fur carpet under both of the chairs.

The room wasn't comfortable. The opposite actually. It was too small, too... Colorless. 

I am claustrophobic, and this space was making me lose it.

I felt the corners of the walls coming closer towards me, I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt my mouth getting dryer, sweat running down my back, my head spinning. I felt numbness. Somehow I felt like I am chocking. It felt like there was something in my throat, that caused it. 

The door opened. It scared the shit out of me. I am sure I jumped to the ceiling. I was hyperventilating. 

I'm sure the incomer is Hall. 

It is him. 

Still, my breath is wheezing. I looked towards the door, right to Hall. He looked so calm. 

He went to the chair in front of me and sat there. Now he suddenly looked worried.

"Are you okay? Why do you look like that?"

"It's no-nothing... You just scared me when you arrived here so suddenly."

"Oh, I apologize. I didn't know I have to knock on my own offices door now." I can see how he is slyly smiling. He does have a point tho.

His joking and calm being makes me calm a little bit. 

"You are Kit right? We met in the hospital...?" He sounded unsure. I guess he has so many other people to deal with that he can't possibly remember all of them.