Mistakes I Made | The Walking Dead

Part 21

It felt weird to me-- all of it. Just looking around at the people who ended up shaping me more than I thought possible, maybe for the last time. I wish I had the chance to thank each of them individually for making me feel like I was important-- like I was needed in the group, but I knew that wasn't possible.

"Liz?" Carl's voice rang from behind me, pulling me out of deep thought, "You ok?"

I nodded lightly, a small smile appearing on my face, "Just waiting for this chapter to finally close." I breathed, trying to allow myself to be at peace with whatever the final outcome is.

Carl returned a smile, a rifle hung over both of our shoulders as everyone began getting into place, "Things will be different after all of this-- better."

"I know it'll be," I nodded again, looking around at all the people, familiar and unfamiliar, "Years from now the Saviors will just be a ghost story you'll be able to tell to Judith and Maggie and Glenn's baby."

"Maybe you and Daryl will have a baby by then too." Carl added, the statement seeming like more of a question.

I let out a slight chuckle, covering the heart ache that the thought caused as I shook my head, knowing that then wouldn't exist for Daryl and I, "I don't think so."

"Hey, anythings possible." Carl shrugged, nudging me lightly, and I guess he was right. Everything that the world has now become is proof that anything is possible, but yet, what I wanted so badly still seemed just out of reach.

"You're gonna lead this place one day, Carl." I breathed, lightly shaking my head as the thought of a future without the Saviors-- without Negan, filled my mind, "Alexandria's going to be around for a long time after this, and one day it's gonna be yours-- all of it."

"You really think my dad's gonna give it up that easily?" He joked, glancing over to me as a smiled pulled on the corners of my mouth.

"Anything's possible." I said sarcastically, repeating what he had said to me as lighthearted laughs continued to fill the space between us.

***

I thought on a day like today, when I was so determined to do what needed to be done, that I wouldn't feel the emotions that had haunted me all this time before, but yet, I was struggling to keep my composure. The thought of a life in Alexandria after Negan and the Savior was like a dream dangling right in front of me-- so close that if I really tried hard enough, I'd just be able to grab it, only to have that dream turn into smoke.. disappearing before my very eyes as reality sets back in.
I do think that there's the slightest possibility that Daryl and I could have a future together, but I'm not one to gamble the lives of others, especially when the odds are at a record breaking low.
At then end of it all, Daryl and I just weren't meant to last forever, but maybe one day we'll meet again in another life, hopefully in a different time, on another planet.

But, as if on queue, his once comforting voice filled my ears again, only now it left me with a sick feeling in my stomach.

I furrowed my brows as I stared at the object he held out to me, very few words being spoken between us before my eyes widened.

I shook my head lightly, "It jams.." I breathed, confusion in my voice as I looked at the familiar gun he held in his hand, "Abraham said there wasn't any hope for it."

"I had him work on it for ya," Daryl murmured lowly as I slowly grabbed ahold of the handgun that held so many memories, "Before everythin'."

I held the cold metal in my hand, everything about it feeling so.. normal; the weight, the dents and scratches, the grip.. it almost felt wrong to have it back.

"Why?" I asked, not understanding the significance of the gun to Daryl.

"I don't know," He mumbled, shrugging lightly, "'Cause it's yours."

I felt speechless as I tried to find a way to convey how much the gesture meant to me-- even if the gun would've never gotten fixed, the thought behind it held something that I couldn't even begin to comprehend, let alone thank him for, especially with what I knew the future held.

I stepped forward toward Daryl, his stare staying stuck to the ground, before connecting our lips in what only one of us would know to be meant as a final goodbye.
The bittersweet feeling stung at my lips as I pulled away, my free hand pushing the hair out of his face as our eyes longingly locked.

"Thank you." I breathed, not only thanking him for the gun that held so many memories, good and bad, but for being everything I could've ever wanted-- everything I needed.

At this point, I couldn't imagine how I would've made it this far without him, and the thought of doing just that after all of this.. is terrifying.

_____
Sorry for the wait

Also, thank you to those of you who helped find a scene I was looking for. Sadly, the time lines didn't match up the way I wanted, but I was still able to do what I had planned, just a little differently