Does Love Sink or Swim? ( Ben Drowned X Suicidal Reader!)

VIII

I awoke in a pool of sweat. I was panting heavily as I reached down to the hem of my sweater ready to pull it off. Having it halfway above my head. I remembered, wait. My hands let go of the fabric and let it drop back down. I forgot. I wiped my palms against my forehead trying to rid myself of sweat. Last night was the first night in forever that I actually dreamt.

I was lost, scared, floating about in darkness. There I am lifeless, my body gliding through the abyss. My eyes flutter open in panic. I started to squirm, I open my mouth to scream but pools of water came rushing down my throat. I'm drowning.

I flail my arms around in an attempt to save myself. My heart is racing. Thick water pools into my lungs strangling it. I grasp my chest to try to tame the flames. It burns. My core erodes in flames. It hurts so badly. I want the burning to stop. I would do anything for it to stop. PLEASE! MAKE IT STOP.

Tears wielded in my eyes. I want this pain to go away. Will this pain ever cease? Tears slowly escaped my eyes causing my orbs to burn as well. The tears just dissipated into the mixture of the water. I tried so desperately to swim to the top. But there was layers among layers of water. It seemed like I could not escape. Is there even a top? Is it just water? Oh, God please... I want this to end.

I kept swimming upwards, higher, higher. All I see is pitch black. Please, I wish there was light. I need to see a light. As if my hopes were about to fall. In my perspective. A small orb of white light gleamed down from a far distance. That light sparked hope. I swam faster and faster. I started to feel fatigued. Air.

I need air. My one hand gripped my throat. Struggling so hard to reach the top. I breathe in that sweet sweet air. As the gleam got larger and brighter, larger and brighter. Something cold wrapped around my ankle. It yanked me down. My insides shivered as I refuse to look down. As I refuse to go back down. I fight against it. Trying to break it's tight grasp. I kick my leg frantically. Trying my hardest to escape. My foot squirmed around and broke loose of it's predator. I swam up as if my life depended on it. Wait, it did...

As I swam higher and higher. My hand outstretched towards the brinks of the water. Air. Precious air, oh so close. Once I thought I was finally there. That, that creature grasped my foot again. Within one pull I came hurdling back into the depths. I opened my mouth. I was so close. Oh so close. Water filled my lungs, I gave up. My eyes slowly started to close shut. My mind went completely blank. It shut off, same as the rest of my body. There in the depths of the thick dark water. I lay, lifeless floating about. My determination shattered.