Flips and Tricks (Travis Pastrana) ON HOLD

Because it hurts too much

Chapter 22

To say things have been awkward would be an understatement. We were already at Lake Powell, we arrived yesterday and that was two days after I kissed Travis. I hated myself for doing it because now I ruined our friendship.

I tried everything in my power to avoid him and well mostly everyone because everyone had something to day about the kiss. God why was I so stupid to do that shit? I really need to check myself into like mental facility of some sort.

Lake Powell was absolutely gorgeous. It was breath taking out here. And staying in a boathouse on a lake in basically canyon was awesome. The weather was amazing so being in the sun and water all day was a must, well for everyone else. I just sat on my bed and moped about my mistake.

"Oh for the love of god Kelsey stop feeling damn sorry for yourself!" I looked up at my door and found Nathan glaring at me. He's been trying me to just come out for the past day and I just wanted to go home.

"Why can't everyone just leave me alone?" I asked with a groan as I looked up at the roof.

"Because you're being childish Kelsey. I don't even know why you're being like this." He said shaking his head. No one knew why I've been withdrawing myself from everything and everyone. And I was not about to tell Nate now. Even Jo came in last night to try and talk to me. "You know what? Forget it!" Nate snapped and walked out of my room.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. Maybe I was overreacting a little bit. I sighed and got up from the bed. As much as I hate to admit it, Nate was right. I had to get over myself and just get out. This sitting around and moping is just getting me under. I walked to my bag and got out my white bikini and black board shorts and a yellow DC tank top. I got dressed and pulled a brush through my hair. Slipping on my black flip flops I stepped out of the boat.

"Hey guys." I said as I walked up to where mostly everyone was sitting next to the water talking and laughing. I smiled at everyone but avoided eye contact with Travis. I sat down next to Special at the end.

"Nice to see your face again Kels." He said and I gave him a small smile and nod.

"Yeah. So what's everyone up to today?" I asked him as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"Just hanging out today. No filming or anything." He frowned down at me and then asked "Are you ok?"

"Yeah." I sighed and nodded my head.

"Are you sure?" He asked and I bit my lip and tried to fight back the tears.

"I'm fine Special." I said sighing and getting up to walk away. He grabbed my hand and I looked back down at him with tears in my eyes.

"You don't look ok." He said frowning and I just shook my head. He shrugged as if to ask me whats wrong and then I glanced up at Travis, he was frowning at the water, Special looked too and then looked back to me and was about to say something when I stopped him.

"Please don't. I'm fine." I said giving him a faked smile and pulled my hand free of his and walked away.

"No wait. I got this." Jolene said to him as she followed me. "Kels! Wait up." I didn't turn around to face her, I just stopped and waited for her to reach me. When she did she put her arm around me and gave me a side hug. "Let's go for a walk." She suggested and I just smiled and nodded.

We didn't talk for a while, we just walked and I'm glad that Jo understood me. She was a really amazing friend. After a while we stopped and sat down next to the water again.

"It was a mistake." I said as I looked out over the water. Jolene turned to me with a frown. I looked at her and continued. "To kiss him. I shoudn't have done it. Not only did I ruin our friendship, I lost him for good."