The Us I Thought We Were ↹ [Poetry]

Skinny Love

I take the time to make all of the food that I eat
This means that there is more time spent on my feet than me shoving my low-carb, non-fat, diet, barely even food, down my throat
This means that maybe I might get the chance to feel skinny and actually believe that my body measures up to your standards
That maybe a man will look at me and crave my clothes on his floor after a night of broken decisions
Because while this may be demeaning to my gender
I do not know what it is like for a man to lust for me in this way.
I do not know what it's like for someone to want me.
I do not know what it's like to feel pretty.
If taking the time to put real peanut butter on homemade wheat toast is what it takes to make me skinny, so be it
If starving myself is what I must do to have a man look at me with desire, consider it done
If late night binges are what it takes to have a meaningless one night stand where all of my emotion is above the covers, we will spend all night underneath
And I will deal with the world some other time
When I'm not kissing your neck
When I'm not running my wandering hands up and down your back as we melt into each other
When you are not making my skin crawl as your hands slowly move up my waist into territory unknown to man
When I
Am skinny