Hopelessly Hopeful

7:04ᴀᴍ

« Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth. »
-Buddha-

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chapter seven

CONFUSION. THAT WAS an incredibly accurate word to describe how I was currently feeling.

⠀⠀⠀Or is having a guy tell you he likes you— maybe even loves you— and then seeing him kissing another girl the next day not something I should be bewildered by?

⠀⠀⠀And this wasn't just any boy. This was Miles. My best friend. I was so confused.

⠀⠀⠀So, I did what any rational minded person would do. I picked up the phone after school, and called his number. It was only seen fit as he usually dropped me home, but today he was three minutes behind schedule, and Miles is never late.

⠀⠀⠀The phone rang four times.

⠀⠀⠀"hey. you already know who it is or you wouldn't be calling. If I didn't pick up, I'm either busy or just don't want to talk to you. Leave a message—"

⠀⠀⠀I hung up and called again. Five times. No answer. So again, I did what any rational minded person would do: I left a voice mail. It went like this:

⠀⠀⠀"hey Miles. It's, Braylee. you're not here and I— well, where are you? I thought we were okay? please call me back once you get this. I'll just catch a ride with Amanda—beep"

⠀⠀⠀I sighed and headed back towards the direction of the school. I cancelled on Mason this morning because I wasn't feeling up to it, but now that I didn't have a ride home, I may as well make some use out of my time.

⠀⠀⠀I quickly sent Mason a text. It took almost no time to get one back.

hey, sorry so late notice. are u good to tutor me today?

sorry. can't.

oh. don't worry about it, I understand. I'll see you tomorrow I guess. hope all is good xx

thanks. I hope so too.

⠀⠀⠀Needless to say, today was a day of pure confusion. I had no idea what was up with Mason, he wasn't his usual bubbly and intrusive self. I could tell something was up but I decided to let it be until he was comfortable to tell me. If he ever was.

⠀⠀⠀I had recently come to the conclusion that I was doing a lot of the opening up in our friendship. If that's what you would call it. When I really think about it, I tell Mason a lot. He on the other hand hasn't really told me much, or anything for that matter. Not that it was a problem, just an observation.

⠀⠀⠀I really wanted to get to know him better though, it was on my list of things to discover. get to know mason was number two just under find untimely happiness. I know it's far fetched but shouldn't that be everyone's number one goal? To me it was my priority, I was living for that sole purpose. To find happiness. The past two years of my life made that goal seem almost impossible and out of reach, but I was still determined to achieve it.

⠀⠀⠀I decided just to walk home. I knew Amanda couldn't pick me up so I didn't bother calling her. She had plans with Logan today, and I knew that because she would not stop talking about how excited she was at lunch. Apparently he was surprising her with some news that she's supposed to be really happy about. And I definitely didn't want to ruin her night.