My Dearest Lover [HIATUS]

Chpt #2 Explanation

"....... what-"

"I-I-I MEANT CAPTAIN! W-WHAT ARE YOU-"

Before I could cover my traces...the distance between us disappeared.

I felt a burned sensation surrounded my left cheek. I gently rubbed my cheek and looked back at my b-brother...

His furrowed eyebrows and gritting teeth showed he was angry.

"WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT LYING?" he asked angrily....

never lie...

I looked down....I couldn't look at him.

"Why...Why would you slap me?-" I asked.

I need to cover this up.

"Your lies are all over...I know the truth" he answered

I...I'm too scared...I'm too scared to admit it

"I-I don't know what your talking about..." I replied still looking down. I couldn't stop the shivering of my voice.

I could see his hands curled into fists.

"What did I tell you about lying!" he shouted a bit louder.

"....." I stood there silently..

I couldn't say anything, I didn't know what to say so I didn't reply.

"After all this time....you were alive?" I heard his voice quiver.

"....."

He thought I was dead? But I thought-

"I...I thought you were dead!..that day....I saw your hand...why? Why did you hide from me!?"

"....."

Huh? W-why am I?....no, I'm starting to cry...

"Louisa, answer me..."

"....."

No...I don't wanna cry....stop it, how can I stop the tears--

"Look AT ME and ANSWER ME!"

I shut my eyes in fear.

"I......I-I couldn't face you" I stepped back.

Running away....that's what I do most now a days..I'm not brave at all...I'm just a stupid and a coward person.

And once again,before I had the chance to escape he grabbed hold of my wrist tightly.

"Answer me.....why did you hide from me?" he's voice quiver.

I shook my arm out off he's grip and walked inches away from him.

"I-I....I was scared....I felt I didn't have the right to be your sister anymore..." I took hold of my left shoulder as I looked away from he's eyes.

"Because....you don't need me...well that is what I thought years ago...so I stood quiet,"

"Why would you think about that?" he asked..

"After the day you were captured...I waited for you...not even a sign or a single note was given...so I thought you hated me by then,"

"Why-" before he could finish his sentence, I stopped him.

"BECAUSE!-....IT WAS ALL MY FAULT!!.....it was all my fault....because of me....you got captured.....if I...IF ONLY I....stayed in the house just like you said;..if only I didn't cried for help, maybe you wouldn't be captured....."

I said a lot there..

I slightly looked up because I was curious of his reaction...nevertheless, from fear I couldn't look at him at all.

"Then, I accepted that you didn't need me anymore. In those times I thought you have Farlan and Isabel to be with you anyways, so I said to myself:....why bother...he doesn't need me anymore"

He was quiet....why...he wasn't answering...

"I....I was a kid that time....even though I was strong and I almost ruled the underground...I still have the mind of a child back then....so there might be the fact, I was stupid and thought of problems that weren't there in the first place."

Before I knew it...hot streams ran out my cheek....

"But as the years go by, I got used hiding from you and also had the logic that you didn't need me anymore."

"But you do, found out about...what happen to..Farlan and Isabel right?" he asked.

"It was...very shocking...k-knowing that they died.....it gave me the urge to finally tell you...however I really got used from hiding my identity that I couldn't tell the truth, even if I wanted too."

In every word...tears kept falling out of my eyes. I turned around, humiliated to show my face.

"I was scared!! I-I wanted to tell you...but there are always hindrances...I-it's just that-....THERE'S THAT FEAR IN ME THAT IS STOPPING ME FROM TELLING YOU..."

"Everything....IF IT WASN'T FOR ME...THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPEN......."

I covered my eyes with my hands as I wiped off the hot tears, I felt my legs quiver in fatigue..and my voice started to have hiccups

"I'M.....I'M SORRY.....I'M SORRY!! THIS ALL MY FAULT, I SHOULDN'T HAVE HIDDEN FROM YOU, I SHOULD HAVE TOLD YOU THE TRUTH, I'M STUPID I ADMIT IT! I'M SORRY I WAS SELFISH BACK THEN, I DISOBEYED YOU, IT'S MY FAULT MOM DIED,I'M SORRY I-"

Before I could continue, I felt it once again....the warmth that I've missed so much....that calm refreshing feeling that felt like forever to grasp. I felt as if I was in a mother's arms.

"Shhh........" he whispered, he patted my head softly just like how he did when I was a kid. He's arms were wrapped around me from behind as his head was burrowed unto my shoulder.

"Enough crying.......shhh...it was never your fault," he whispered from behind.

I stood there silently this time, as I tried to stop my tears.

"Remember that promise, when you were a kid?" he asked. He turned me around to face him and lets go of the hug. He looked at me in the eye with his hands on my shoulders.

"I promised you that I'd protect you no matter what and that I'd be always there beside you....but I failed. When I was captured..I heard your screams but I couldn't do anything...I thought you died...." he looked down, "It was a big burden....and it became even more heavier when Isabel and Farlan died"

"Louisa..." he hugged me once more.

"You were never a mistake, you did nothing wrong, you are a blessing, you are the only one left for me, your very important piece in my life, you are gift that I have never thought I'd have....I'm sure that's what mom would say as well."

He hugged me tighter, "I'm sorry........I wasn't a good brother....I wasn't there for you as I promised, left you alone....I'm sorry. Your my little sister, my dearest sister; it's my responsibility to take care of you and I failed," he looked down, depressed.

I shook my head,"That's not true....with your teachings, I have survived this long,"

He hugged me even tighter,and like cradled me in his arms. This time I hugged him back as well.

"I miss you so much.....too much," I felt his body quiver and I soon realized he was crying so it made me cry as well.

"I miss you too Aniki."

"So after all, it was all a misunderstanding."

"Oy! Levi! long time no see, how's it going?"

THE STORY HASN'T ENDED YET