Benefits

Ch. 29: Leave A Trace

"It was ecstasy." His voice clearer.

I remember that part, I remember the way he grasped me. The way he pulled me against the wall and had his way. The way he groped me, and how I liked it and didn't at the same time. I wanted something else. Someone else. I remember his tongue slip through my lips, and the pill falling down my throat.

Is it bad I only remember that? What does that make of me? How does that make me, me? Does it name me a slut?

And as the corrupted thoughts evolve around me, I realized I don't remember the rest.

"After that... what happened?"

"We were just having fun." His continued excuse continues.

"What happened Dawson?!"

With little hesitation he continues telling me the happenings. "We made out some more, and you suggested going to the bathroom, so we can be secluded. After that you spazzed out." His eyes grow darker around his black eye that's healing. "It's your fault I'm like this." His steps growing back to me, as I fall against the far wall. "Without your panic attack, my face would be normal, and no one would have gotten in trouble. Jake beat the shit out of me with a sucker punch because I was trying to help your ass! He thought I was hurting you, but I was only trying to help."

His anger grew more and more as he spoke. "Jake almost got expelled for you. You're lucky your name was out it all, or your sure perfect record would be ruined."

"I-"

"But don't worry, gorgeous." His hand glides across my arm, making my arm hair prickle. "He's coming back next week."

I needed to leave now. Now. Now.

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His eyes changed again, like if it was a snap of a finger. "Dawn are you alright?"

I look up to the ceiling of the dim light above us in the small area.

"I didn't mean to seem so harsh on you, but just realize how much trouble you got us in, right?"

I nod, gulping down. I need him away, everything a way. I wanted to know more. I wanted to know why James and Dawson didn't get in trouble. Why out of the 3 of them, how my name didn't get in the middle of it all. But I couldn't. Not when I felt the walls close in around me.

"What's up with you and Jake?"

New questions. New words. My eyes travel down to his chest, completely confused by the question. "Nothing."

"Why is he always on you like a dog." He scoffs, laughing to himself.

"I need to get to class." I announce. I try to walk past him, but he grabs my arm roughly.

"So when I ask the questions you don't have to answer, huh?"

"Let go of me." I tug my arm back, and I can already feel him try to reach for me again, but I'm already screaming in his ear. "Fuck off!" He recoils a bit.

"Stop screaming!" He yells back.

"Fuck off then!" I walk past him, and open the door out to the hall. All eyes are on me, and I feel my whole body ache of redness.