She Wears Toms, He Wears Converse

Chapter 13

"Fighting Fear"

Astrid's P.O.V

"Because they're reserved for you." He answered. I groaned. Lucky me....

We were silent for what was left of the trip to Carter's house, which was about ten steps.

"I'M HOMEEEEEEEEEE!" Carter sang as he slid through the front door.

"Welcome home. Did you ask Astrid to come?" She questioned.

"Yes, Mom. You think you'd be happier to see your own son instead of a girl you met last night." He answered.
               
"I liked her... She was like the daughter I never had." His mother, Elle, called as she came to greet us at the entrance.
               
"Well, thanks... That really makes me feel welcome." Carter sarcastically answered while his mom pulled me in for a heartwarming hug.
               
"I'll start cooking dinner around five. Do you have any preferences?" She asked me.
               
"I pretty much like every type of food..." I answered.
               
"That's great. I'll call you down when it's ready." She stated as Carter began to pull me upstairs.

------------------------
               
I was lying on Carter's bed in his room. He let me go on his Macbook Pro while he played one of my favorite video games titled 'The Legend of Zelda.' He was currently playing the wind waker on the Gamecube. I reblogged another picture from my dashboard before breaking the silence between us.
               
"Are you sure that I should eat here?" I inquired.
               
"You were downstairs, weren't you? My mother adores you. In fact, I think she'd be offended if you didn't stay." He answered. I just left out a soft 'hmm' and returned to my thoughts and reblogging posts.
               
"Plus, I'm monitoring your eating schedule," Carter added.
               
"What?!" I questioned.
               
"Well, I saw the notes people sent you. I don't want that stuff getting to you. You're too beautiful to listen to comments like that." He said but, truthfully, I didn't believe a word he said. Compliments are lies in my eyes. Maybe, just maybe I deserved all the things I got called?
               
"You know how I feel about compliments, Carter..." I whispered. He pressed the start button and put the screen on the equipment page. Carter took his feet off of the footrest one at a time before standing up and making his way to the bed. He didn't hesitate with any of his movements or words, he practically spoke as soon as he took his place next to me.
               
"What if I'm not lying?" He questioned while peering into my eyes. He searched for an answer within my eyes because he knows I'd never tell the truth with words.
               
"Compliments are lies," I whispered. He closed his eyes tightly, furrowing his brow slightly in the process.
               
"Stop." He muttered. I looked back at the computer screen because I didn't know what else to do. I didn't know how to react or respond. Carter shut the laptop screen, leaving it on my lap and used his fingers to direct my gaze to meet his.
               
"You aren't getting out of this that easily..." He told me. "Why can't you accept compliments?" He asked.
               
"Why can't you drop it?" I questioned.
               
"Because it's something worth analyzing." He answered.
               
"I don't deserve to be saved..." I whispered so that it was barely audible. I looked down in no particular direction just away from his glistening blue orbs. Sometimes he makes me feel wanted. Which is also one of the reasons I'm scared to be around Carter. I'm scared of being happy because happiness is an unstable emotion. Happiness can be lost in an instant, but sadness always stays. Carter makes me happy, which terrifies me.
               
Carter snaked his arms around my waist, encompassing me within his grasp. He squeezed me tighter, removing any space between us.
               
"I will save you, even if it's the only thing I do." He whispered in my ear. I was hopeful but, I couldn't help but think that those words were pointless promises that would be forgotten eventually.
               
"Carter..." I whispered while moving slightly. Only now did I realize how close we are.
               
"Please don't ask me to let go." He murmured. I let out a soft sigh before he added: "I wasn't going to anyway."
               
"You're so tiring," I said as he loosened his grip so that now we were lying, facing each other, and one of his arms was draped around my waist.
               
"You know you like it." He joked.
               
"I thought I hid that so well." I went along with the joke while giving him a little smirk, which he returned instantly. Something I like about Carter is how he is so easy going and, he'll play along with all of my pointless jokes. We sat a few moments in silence, but it wasn't anywhere's near awkward.
               
"You know what I realized... I just won a second argument." Carter stated.
               
"What can I say? You taught me how to skateboard." I started. "But you won't win the next one."
               
"Are you sure about that?"
               
"Not entirely..." I answered, which caused him to snicker. Only then did I notice how comforting his laugh was. Why was I noticing all of these things?
               
"Go play your game," I told him.
               
"I can't figure it out." He replied with a smirk, which was probably a lie but, who can say no to video games?
               
I took a seat in one of the two chairs, catching a glimpse of the equipment menu in the process. I've played this game numerous times, and from experience and how all of the items were collected. I assumed that he was either at the very end of the wind temple or he had just finished the wind temple. I also recognized the music, which indicated that he wasn't any further in the game.
               
"Nice excuse," I muttered.
               
"I want to see you play." He stated while placing the silver Gamecube controller in my hands before taking a seat next to me. I pressed the start button in the center, and the controller began to vibrate vigorously in my hands. A giant sandworm erupted from the sand. Carter wasn't even watching the screen; he was only watching me. Little did he know I've played this game quite a few times before.
               
Without hesitation, I took out the hook shot and locked onto Molgera's tongue. While the tool did the job by bringing it to me, I pressed the red 'B' button to use Link's sword to slash Molgera's tongue. I repeated the process a few times before the sandworm died an honorable death. After I collected the heart container, I returned to the equipment screen. Carter looked at me with his mouth wide open. I stood up, placed the controller on his lap, and returned to the bed and began to reblog more pictures onto my blog.
               
"You... You never.. You never told me you played video games!" Carter said, sounding utterly astonished.
               
"You never asked..." I replied while shrugging it off and reblogging a picture of a cup of Starbucks. Mmm, Starbucks...
               
"That's it. I officially want to know everything about you. Every little detail." He announced.
               
"Don't you think that'll take a long time?" I questioned.
               
"Well, then just answer one question... How did you do that so quickly?" He inquired.
               
"The Legend of Zelda is one of my favorite types of games. I used to play the Windwalker a lot. That temple and boss especially. Harlow and I used to sit in my room for days in the summer when we were eight. She always used to make me beat Molgera for her when she would play." I answered, honestly.

--------------------------
               
"Take a bite, Astrid. It won't hurt."  Carter ordered while sitting down next to me and placing his plate of pizza on the island. I nervously sipped my Arizona Iced Tea while staring at the pizza. It wasn't just as simple as 'taking a bite'... The guilt that I would feel afterward would be inevitable.
               
"I'm going to sit here until you eat it," Carter added.
               
"You do like pizza, don't you?" Elle asked.
               
"Of course I do," I answered with a grin.

Well, at least I did before. I used to eat all the time but, I try to hide the fact that I'm barely eating anymore. No one has noticed but Carter, and he's convinced on bringing me back to my old ways.  I took another sip of my iced tea before staring intensely at the slice of pizza that lay in front of me. It wasn't one bite, and then the problem would be solved. Carter didn't know what he was starting but, let me tell you it would be the beginning of a long war that would take place in my mind. I feared that if I took one bite that I would remember how much I truly enjoyed the food. It's not that I want to hate food forever. I'm just tired of looking at anything and quickly analyzing the number of calories it has.
               
"Please... For me?" Carter whispered only loud enough for me to hear. I turned for the first time in what must've been minutes to look at him. His eyes even seemed to persuade me. I instantly regretted looking into them because I knew that he had won yet again another argument. I diverted my gaze back to the pizza. The longer I had to think about it, the more doubt I would have, so, without hesitation, I took a quick bite of my pizza. Flavor exploded in my mouth and, exactly what I feared happened. I missed this. Carter couldn't hide the smile on his face. He now began to eat, and, as much as I wanted to put the pizza down, I couldn't manage. It was so delicious. What if this boy is saving me? I began to fear that almost more than I feared my new love for food.
               
"Astrid, would you like to stay overnight?" Elle inquired, igniting conversation between the three of us. "We have a lovely guest room." She added. Carter let out a heavy sigh.
               
"Actually, my mother wants me home by eleven and, I don't want to intrude," I answered.
               
"I truly don't mind but, I don't want you going against your mother's word, either. Just remember, the door is always open for you here." She told me. Wow, is Elle always so inviting and lovely?
               
I can't believe I did it, but I managed to eat an entire piece of pizza. I was incredibly full, and it felt as if my stomach was about to burst. That brought me a wave of sadness, but the tide was only coming in. I knew the guilt would soon come, but, for now, I was disappointed that I could only eat one slice of pizza. I used to eat about two and a half. What am I doing to my body?
             
I quickly helped Elle pile the plates into the dishwasher after we were finished eating. She thanked me but, Carter was already pulling me back to his room. I swear he's so impatient at times. As soon as we made it through the door, he lifted me into his arms and spun me around.
               
"I'm so proud of you." He almost shouted while putting me down but, that didn't stop him from almost suffocating me in a hug. I don't know why I'm so terrified of being happy but, sometimes Carter makes me want to try. That is quite a horrific thought on its own.