Heroes of Dreamland, Book 3: The World of Nintendo (OLD)

The Author Tortures Some Badguys, The Battle Begins

Under the sea, near Nintendo City:

Master Hand groaned. He had, eventually, convinced the badguys from each point to help him out with his plans. Of course, what they didn't know was that as soon as they had taken down the big, scary, 'great evil,' he was going to take all of them down and then rule as supreme emperor of Nintendo World.

But, of course, all four of these others had as big of egos as he himself did, and it showed. Right now, for example, the other four were all having an argument over who was the evilest. "Look, all of you. Just shut up!"

The other badguys grudgingly stopped talking, turned, and looked at him.

Drumming his fingers against the floor in irritation, he told the others, "We're all truly evil, with the exception of DeDeDe. Personally, I would've much rather had Nightmare along, but he's gone now, curse his soul. DeDeDe, you're evil enough to help, as long as you don't turn soft during the fight. Now, we all know why we're here, don't we?"

"We're here to try to find the mucho big badguy and take him down!" Bowser roared, stamping his feet and making the high-tech submarine (supplied by Giovanni) that they were in shake unnervingly.

"All right, Turtle Man. Chill," DeDeDe huffed, insulted at not being considered as evil as the others. "If you break through the hull of this tin can and drown us all, my ghost is going to be chasin' your ghost around with a hammer. That's evil, right?"

"It was a good attempt, DeDeDe," Ganondorf encouraged him, somewhat sarcastically, while Giovanni growled as he pet his Persian on the head,

"Are you implying that my submarine is poorly built? I'll have you know, this is the strongest experimental alloy in all of Pokémonland. This beauty is anything but a 'tin can!'"

"Experimental, huh? Is that why I think I'm having an allergic reaction to it?" Bowser inquired as he scratched his arm.

"No, you're just having a problem because of the years' worth of dirt on your skin," Giovanni replied with a snort, thus beginning another argument.

"Oh, for the love of all things foul," Master Hand sighed, wishing he had a face so he could facepalm. As it was, he began hitting himself against the wall in aggravation. "Shut up, you idiots! How will we ever defeat this oh-so-scary upstart if we can't even make it to land?"

"Gyaaaaar!" something suddenly said outside, and all of the badguys' expressions changed to various forms of 'oh, dwee.'

"What is that, anyway?" Bowser demanded, trying to still sound all arrogant and scared-of-nothing.

"I'm sure it's nothing the sub can't handle," Giovanni reassured him as he frantically tried to calm his Persian, which was now hissing at the universe and trying to bite his hand off, its fur on end.

"I don't know what it was, but I still don't think it sounded good," Ganondorf commented. "I guess we're about to find out how strong this 'experimental alloy' really is."

"Shut up, fool," Giovanni gave him the evil eye. "Ow! Persian! Daddy's hand is not a chew toy!"

All of the other no-good-doers/good-no-doers/do-no-gooders looked at him in disbelief. "Daddy?" DeDeDe snickered. "That's rich."

"Oh, shut up. He's just jealous because he doesn't have a cute widdle pet like I do, isn't that right Persian? Yes it is, oh yes it is!" he crooned to the cat Pokémon, which lunged at his face. "Gargh! No! Bad kitty!"

"Gyaaaaar!" the noise came again, louder and crankier-sounding this time.

"Oh, for heaven's sake. Can we get a visual on it, or something?" Master Hand demanded, going over and trying to hit a button on a control panel, and instead hitting five or six, due to how large his fingers were.