Mon Frere ✓

twenty-four

Laurent's POV

"~how's he now?" Roy asked as I shook my head to myself.

"I don't know, man. He's good I guess," I sighed.

"Are you okay?"

"No," I answered honestly. How could I be? "Maybe we shouldn't have come back here, Roy? If I hadn't asked him-"

"Don't go blaming yourself, Laurent. It was going to happen anyway. I mean, this guy could have gotten Larry wherever he was," Roy said. "So, relax."

I looked down at the white floor tiles. "I don't even know what to do anymore. I can't face him."

"You feel guilty?"

I shut my eyes. If I hadn't asked this would never have happened.

"You're going to have to face him eventually, Laurent."

I knew that but what was I going to do when that happened? There are some roles I can't play. I can't pretend with Larry.

"Maybe not now. I'm not ready to reintroduce myself to someone who knows me like the back of his palm. Neither am I ready to pretend we don't have a connection. I rather not see him than lie that I don't know him," I  shook my head.

I felt so completely wrecked, like there was nothing good coming for me.

"So, you're gonna just hide outside his room until he remembers you? You won't even try?"

"What am I suppose to do, Roy? Go in there and pretend that nothing happened between Larry and I? Pretend that we never loved each other?"

"That's not what I'm saying, Laurent."

"But that's what they're saying and I don't know why. Aren't we supposed to try and make him remember those memories?" I felt my hand get sweaty as my phone started to slip from my hand, so I clutched it tighter. "We had so many wonderful memories. They were so beautiful and we were so in love that nothing else mattered. How am I supposed to forget them?"

"Laurent-"

"I love Larry, Roy. I love him so much but I can't do this. If this happened because of me-"

"It didn't."

"-then what if staying with him would cause him more harm than good? What if I can't protect Larry and worse things happen, what do I do?"

"What are you saying, Laurent?"

"Now that Larry doesn't really remember me like that, maybe I should go. Maybe I should come back to LA and not look back. Save us both the hurt now and later."

"Running away from your problems wouldn't help you at all. Stop saying nonsense." Roy said firmly. But I wasn't listening.

"I can't see him, the hurt is too much for me!"

"For you? What about Larry, I thought you said you love him. Why are you leaving him now that he needs you?" He was trying to make me feel guilty and he was doing well at it.

"It's because I love him, okay? It's because I love Larry that I'm leaving. I don't-" My voice cracked. "Roy-" I sobbed.

"Laurent, don't do this to yourself, man. Please. Just have mercy on yourself."

"I don't want him to fall back in love with me. I don't want him to love me like he used to because loving me would only hurt him and-"

I heard a sharp intake of breath beside me as I turned to see my mum standing just above me, gaping at me with an open mouth.