delicate

18: Malfoy

A/N the trio are burying dobby (oops), doing their thing idk

Draco slowly walked down one of the many staircases in the overly large manor. his heart felt so heavy, his walk so slow. he walked further and further away from his bedroom. He felt like something sad or dark was pushing down on his chest.

He struggled to breathe as he carried on walking down the black stone stairs. his head pounded and his eyes were blurry from the tears that were struggling to stay in his grey eyes.

"Going somewhere?" Draco froze, his tears rushed down his cheeks like students running out of school on the last day before the holidays.

Snape was standing a few steps behind Draco, his arms crossed and his black hair that looked slightly grey from the grease that lie over the old locks of hair that he quite obviously hadn't looked after. Well either that or he was simply getting old.

Snape gave Draco a sympathetic look, his eyebrow raised with confusion. "Want to talk about it?" Severus asked. "We could go outside if you'd like" Snape said, Draco nodded and carried on walking down the stone steps.

it was incredibly quiet, the only noise was the sound of footsteps that echoed around the room, the sound bouncing off the cold dark walls.

Snape gave draco another sympathetic look as the teenager sobbed silently. Sobbed... its such a childish word. when you think or say the wod you think of a girl 'sobbing' over a breakup. Or a young girl crying over a lost teddy.

"Everything in this place is magic proof, the door wont open if you say alohamora" Draco muttered and Snape muttered a spell. A key appeared in his hand, The key was made of black metal, the word 𝑀𝒶𝓁𝒻𝑜𝓎 engraved in cursive silver letters.

Snape forced the key into the keyhole, he then pushed the large doors open. "Everyone the Malfoys can trust have that spell, You obviously don't have it yet. The trace isn't on you anymore but you could still get expelled from Hogwarts" Snape said calmly as he and Draco walked out into the garden. "But your the headmaster of Hogwarts. You wouldn't expel me" Draco muttered and Snape shook his head, slightly startled by the younger boys response.

Draco knew the garden like the back of his hand, His favourite part of the garden was the maze that felt endless. He could get easily lost as the walls move every three hours.

There was the Large black fountain that had the Malfoy family crest in carved in the concrete it sat on top of. The fountian's water looked slightly odd in the dark garden.

There was also the large lake that stretched for miles. The water lying eerily still, it's smooth water rippling every few minuets.

Draco began walking with the older man, his eyes fixed in front of him. He was terrified that if he turned around he'd burst out crying. He was also afraid that Snape would think of him differently.

"Could you tell me why you used the cruciatus curse on yourself...? or is that a bad place to start" Snape asked.

Draco sighed, sweat forming on his forehead. "Can we start somewhere else? Like why I've been so ill lately?" Draco asked, finally making eye contact with the man standing next to him. Snape nodded, his greasy hair still stuck to his forehead, which is odd because when someone nods their hair moves with them.

"Well I... I've been.... sad? No that's not the right word. The nightmares I had as a kid are gone obviously. But I remember in one of them I met Harry Potter. We were standing on Platform 9 3/4, it was weirdly quite and the train wasn't there. It was almost too perfect. He was so kind at first, he shook my hand and we began talking about what houses we wanted to be in. Suddenly the goddamn Mudblood and her perfect boyfriend Weasley. The youngest weasel... Weasley was there. Harry laughed at me "Oh honey, there's no chance that I'd like you. We'd never work. You're far too selfish you stupid Slytherin. He stepped forewarn, placing a kiss on my cheek before slapping me and walking away" Draco looked at his hands. "I was so confused when I woke up, My mind was racing and I didn't know what to do. Blaise sat with me, he was concerned and I broke down. Blaise had already told me that he was gay, it was first year for gods sake! But Blaise told me everything. We were close but Crabbe and Goyle hated him. At least I thought they did. Well it turns out that Blaise was dating Goyle so yeah" Draco laughed.

Snape nodded for Draco to carry on. "Everything that happened in first year revolved around Perfect Potter. I was jealous, so fucking jealous. So naturally I bullied him. It was that and father always told me to bully him. Deep down I felt bad for it.

"I started lying about my life for people to think I was interesting and different. Pansy knew I was lying and so did Crabbe and Goyle. They'd tell me but Blaise didn't, in second year Blaise attempted suicide. He had the next three years off school, he tried over and over again but each time he failed. I was terrified that he'd win and die. I began depressed, so depressed that I cried myself to sleep for weeks. I stupidly fell in love, with someone who I shouldn't have fallen in love with. It was Harry freaking Potter" He sighed and Snape nodded, "So to hold it all back I 'dated' girls and began Slytherin's stupid slut" he paused and tears began slipping down his sunken in face. "I was quickly becoming my father, and naturally I hated it. Blaise came back in sixth year, he was different. On the train to  Hogwarts he acted like he liked Pansy, I was obviously confused until he spoke to me later. I started self harming and i no longer wanted to be here" As quick as he wiped tears more slipped down his now flushed face. "I was scared to tell people how I felt. I spent most of my time alone crying. Well until Harry Potter began talking to me. He had a panic attack on the train to the Weasley house. I calmed him down as the bloody ginger idiot" "which one" Snape interrupted, Draco laughed through his tears. "Ron, you know Harry's best friend. He left the compartment.

"I kissed him, I fucking kissed Harry bloody Potter" Draco sighed and more tears formed in the corners of his eyes, they fought past Draco's closed eyelids. "But why would you use the cruciatus curse on yourself?" Severus asked. Draco looked down, his eyes focused on his shoes, which were practically falling apart, They matched him at that exact moment.

He'd fought the idea for years, his mind finding it too much to cope with. He was afraid, absolutely terrified, "The fear of falling apart" He whispered, His eyes still staring at the broken shoes.

"It wasn't me" He whispered, feeling foolish for saying such a thing, Of course it was his fault. He hadn't fought off the imperius curse. 

A/N END OF CHAPTER

Sorrrrrryyyyyyyy I'll put another chapter up tomorrow... or today because its 12:34 

1236 words xxx