Aesthetically Vintage |Punk!H.S|

The Reality

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Chapter 19

I should have pieced it together sooner.

I should have realised it before-- before she died.

They started fighting, Mom and dad, about the smallest things that were blown out of proportion. They would scream and shout at each other in the kitchen, Holly, Jacob and I would stay in one of our rooms, the three of us. I would do anything to take their minds of the shouting coming from down stairs. This went on for two months straight

Usually after a fight dad would leave the house for a few hours, then come back in the middle of the night. They usually thought in the afternoon. The day after the fight no one said anything about it, we all just acted like it was nothing.

But on one particular night it seemed worse than it usually was. Holly and Jacob feel asleep after watching a movie in my room, but they were still fighting. I had snuck out quietly and sat myself on the staircase, so they couldn't see me.

"Why are you always like this Katherine? Your always in such a-a depressed state?!"

"Oh I don't know Chris your always at work, fixing someone else's home appliance when I asked you weeks ago to fix our microwave!"

"Is this what this is about 'cause if it is then I'll just get my car keys."

"Don't bother this time Chris, I'll go, you always have the luxury of leaving!" I heard the door slam.

The next morning I had gotten up extra early to get ready for an exam I had, just as I was making myself some tea in the kitchen I heard the front door open. I had no idea who would be coming in at this time, so I walked through the hall. Mom was standing in front of the door, her hand were flat on the door and she started to cry.

"Mom?" She whipped around quickly wiping her eyes and putting on a smile, "hi sweetheart."

"Are you okay, where were you last night?"

"I just had to um... to take care of some things. Come on let's eat breakfast, wouldn't want to be late for school." She walked off into the kitchen.

I was confused at that very moment, many ideas ran through my head but I chose to ignore them.

Maybe if had those suspicions then it wouldn't have escalated to this. Even now as I sit, my head against the glass, it seemed so easy to have figure it out-- but I didn't.

"What are you thinking about?" He asks, I don't turn look at him, my head is permanent attached to the car window, watching the street lights pass by. The glowing light gives my eyes a little sting each one we pass.

"I might have known before."

"What do you mean?"

"My parent used to fight, she left one night and didn't come back till the next morning then she had to go one a three day trip just outside Phoenix, showing around a client for her stupid real estate company, two days later we find out she's dead."

"You don't blame yourself do you?"

"I don't know, who knows maybe if I had asked more questions or said something, she'd still be alive, maybe my parent would have gotten divorced instead."

"Don't you dare blame yourself Kodaline, your mother did something wrong not you, I don't ever want to hear you blame yourself understood," he firmly states.

"Yeah..."

My eyes look up to my house as Harry parks in front. Taking a deep breath I remove my head from the window, sitting up I remove his jacket from my shoulder and pass it to him. He takes it, "I'll walk you inside."

"You don't have to do that."

"I'm walking you in."

I didn't object this time, we both got of the car and we didn't say anything as we walked up the concert pathway.

We take the last step up onto the porch-- as if he was watching from inside dad opens the front door to let us in.

"Koda thank god your alright," father says as I step through the threshold, ignoring him.

When I look up, Gloria, Jay, Anne and Des are still here, they give me sympathetic smiles. Deja vu hits me like a tone of bricks. I feel the same sympathy from them now, to how I did when she died. I hate it. Gritting my teeth I walk past everyone, straight up the stairs.

"Koda please talk to us, talk to me--"

"That's not my name!" I spat spinning around on the staircase, "no one is to call my that, my name is Kodaline!"

"But that's the nickname that your..."

"Yes I know. My dead cheating mother gave me that nickname. Call me by my real name or don't bother at all."

I rush up to my room and slam my door shut.

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