A/N: I'm posting the next two chapters now so it will be like a bandaid.
Chapter Song: Say Something cover by Alex and Sierra
As much as Bella tried not to, she couldn't help letting what Angela said affect her. She found herself pulling away from Edward the following two days when everything inside of her screamed at her not to.
She was just about to go to sleep when she heard a full-fledged knock on the window. Her whole body shook with terror as she stood frozen.
"Bella, it's me." She only slightly relaxed after hearing Edward's voice.
She heaved the window up and stuck her head out to see him clinging to a tree branch for dear life. She looked down the tree. He had to use an impressive amount of strength and energy to get up there since there weren't any branches near the ground.
"What are y-you doing?" she wished she didn't stutter anymore but she had to remind herself what Vicky constantly drilled into her head, It will get better with time.
"I'm starting a band," was his sarcastic reply.
She frowned and started closing the window.
"WAIT! I'm sorry. Please, wait."
Bella lend out again. "Why are you here?"
"I needed to see you. You've been blowing me off for the past two days. Can I come in?"
She sighed, looking down at the vertigo inducing distance. She looked to Edward, he wasn't freaking out, but he didn't exactly look cozy either.
"Yes."
He tried to stretch his arm but couldn't reach the window. Bella reached out and took his hands. He slung himself forward, his body thumped loudly against the side of house. Their faces were inches from each other.
"I can't believe you did this," Bella said, stepping away as he pulled his way up the window. "Why didn't you just throw rocks at the window like a normal person?"
He scratched his arm as he shrugged. "I was desperate."
"Stay here," she ordered as she tip-toed to Charlie's room to stick her ear against the door. Loud snoring echoed through the wood, she breathed somewhat easier as she walked back to her room, only for the nerves to hit her tenfold as she took in Edward's tense form.
She closed the door gently, staying her distance as she stared at the boy she loved so much. The fact that she loved him hurt so much more.
He gazed at her, frustrated and confused, "What's wrong?"
Bella looked down, twiddling with the end of her Jack Sparrow shirt.
"Bella, please." So much desperation and anxiety coated his words.
She looked at him, working up the nerve to tell him everything. When Bella finally told him about Angela and her past and how she feared he'd done the same to her, his face became a rock fortress.
"How could you believe that?" he finally asked after a long stretch of deafening silence.
She shrugged. "Why else would you be with me?"
"How about because I fucking love you!" he's voice was rising higher and higher.
"Quiet," she snapped, opening the door and poking her ear out to listen for footsteps. "You'll wake Charlie." She opened the door all the way after minutes of listening. "Let's go outside."
She walked out, not waiting to see if he agreed with her suggestion.
She felt his presence behind her as if it were a blanket just coming out the dryer, wishing she could wrap herself up with him. She snapped herself out of that self-destructive thought as she slowly opened the creaky back door and walked all the way to the woods.
He followed not saying a thing as everything felt sharp and painful inside. He was pissed at the world, but was more scared out of his mind about losing her.
She stopped, keeping her back turned to him as she gazed at the moon through a break in the foliage.
"Bella, please, say something."
She turned to him, all her fear and sadness swirling in her eyes as her lips quivered. "I don't know what to believe anymore."
He stepped to her and stopped when she stepped back, hurt pierced his heart to see her cringe away from him. "I promise, I didn't do anything. I love you. All I've done was love you."
She was shaking her head over and over again, as she whispered, "I loved you too."
"Loved? As in, not anymore?"
She wouldn't answer him as tears danced in her eyes.
He dropped to the ground, not caring at all if he got his pants dirty as tears freely fell. "Are you breaking up with me?"
Bella was fully crying at this point too. Words were lost to her again. She sat cross-legged in front of him. She was too far away for him to touch her, but he was sure she'd pull away if he tried.
She was finally able to fight through the tears to say, "Of course I love you, that's w-what makes this so painful."
Hope flickered in his chest only to dwindle when he realized she didn't answer his last question.
"I want to believe you," she went on. "There's a l-large part of me that does."
"How much of you doesn't believe me?" The fact that any part of her questioned him hurt beyond belief but he fought the pain. He wanted to work this out for the sheer fact that he couldn't imagine being without her.
She shrugged. "Only a small part that won't go away."
"What can I do to prove myself?"
Bella looked at him very sadly. "That's e-exactly the point. You shouldn't have to prove yourself. I wish I didn't feel this way."
"Well, you do," he said with purpose as his tears dried up. "And the only way we can work through this is if we're open and honest with each other."
Bella nodded but said nothing.
Edward spoke, because the silence was too loud. "What Angela went through sucks, and what you went through does too. And I wish I could take all your pain and doubt away and bear it for you, but I can't. So please, please tell me what to do."
She looked into his eyes for a long time. He kept his mouth shut now, knowing that this was the moment. The moment that was going to change their future together.
"I think I need time."
He hung his head as his whole body ached, "How much?"
She shrugged. "Maybe I need counseling."
He nodded. "If that's what you think you need. How long should I wait?"
"As long as you want."
He looked at the girl he loved, wondering why everything had turned to shit so quickly. He was so angry, but not at her. Never at her. "Forever then."
Chapter Note: **Hides under the covers** Please don't throw things at me. The next chapter will be coming up very soon, I promise.
I don't completely disagree that it's unfair for Bella to question Edward, but it's just something they go through, I promise not to drag the angst out for too long.
It's hard to explain why Bella is questioning things. It's not that she thinks Edward's a bad guy, it's just the opposite. She believes he's too good to be true...This is very difficult to explain. She's a young girl who's been through hell and back many times. She has doubts and isn't as perfect as Edward believes her to be.
Again, I'm sorry if these next couple of chapters turn people away from this story, but it just feels right to me.
Everyone has been so great,
Phee
