All We Are Is Actors On A Stage (Zack Merrick)

Time for change

Tour was coming to an end. I was on FaceTime with Heather for about an hour and then james for about twenty minutes. He was picking me up in my car and I was driving him home and then myself. Our last stop was Boston and then we flew out from there the next morning. We all had hotel rooms that night too. I had mine with ryan because we always agreed to share them since we can handle each other and the others always want to see each other. I get annoyed when Lynn is in our room late at night talking to Casey and then Casey complains about tired she is the next morning. I could murder for less reasons.

I wasn't excited to leave zack. I was dreading it so badly. Him and I hadn't really discussed it. We had briefly but it was more of a "oh we can handle it somehow" type of talk not something serious. I didn't know what I would do knowing he wasn't right next door in his bus waiting to greet me every morning. I had actually been very happy this last month and a half and I wasn't ready to give that up. As selfish as it sounds. But I had no choice.

I did end up calling my mom. That blew up in my face too. Her initial reaction was to yell at me for ever kicking her out of my life but I immediately said if she didn't calm down I was re blocking her for good. I ended up doing that because she brought up me quitting school and smoking still and how I'm messing up in her eyes. I didn't wanna deal with it.

I woke up in the hotel room. What time was it? I was in Boston. It was noon. I slept for about ten hours. I was shocked and happy about it. I looked at my phone sitting on the bedside table. Ryan wasn't even in the room. What the hell. I had ten messages. Why. Just why.

Zack:
Good morning beautiful. Thought we could get breakfast. Let me know when you wake up. Xo

Zack:
Babe? Damn. You're out cold.

Ryan:
Hey. Left to go do some stuff before we head home. Call zack he's harassing us all about you.

Alex:
Hey! Just wanted to make sure you're okay after last night. Let me know when you wake up.

Last night? What happened last night?? We were in Boston. Day off....I went to a bar. With the guys and my band. I drank. A lot. What did I do?? I never drink. I don't even know how I act when I'm drunk. Oh god.

Ryan:
Olivia we've been calling you all morning please wake up. I locked myself out.

Lexa:
Just so you know your phone clock is off. You fucked it up last night. So if you could wake the fuck up we'd all appreciate it.

Lynn:
We're going to the front desk we need to get in.

Ryan:
On our way up with a key. Hope your awake.

That was two minutes ago. Oh my god. What's the actual time? I looked at the alarm clock on the side table.

4 pm. I slept until four FUCKING pm. Zack hasn't even tried contacting me in five hours. What did I do last night. WHAT DID I DO. I fucked up I just don't know how. I got up and started getting my clothes on for the show. I looked in the mirror. I AM death. I look like I died.

The door opened and my band poured in. Fuck.

"WOW. LOOK WHOS ALIVE." I must have looked as upset as I was because Casey immediately shut up. "I'll punch myself. What happened i feel so bad are you okay."

"What......what happened last night?!" I mumbled while messing with my messed up hair I was trying to mend somehow with dry shampoo and a brush. Lynn came over to help.

"Well." Ryan started. He's the blatantly honest one. So this is good I guess. "You got super shit faced. Like so bad. I don't know why. But apparently alex does. You poured your soul out to him at like three am." Three am?? I thought I went to bed at like 2. "You started drinking and we all asked why and if you were sure, for obvious reasons. You said yes. You just kept chugging. Turns out your a sappy and happy drunk. Started telling us you loved us a ton. Zack was just watching. He seemed off about it all. About 1 am he just got up and left. That's when you and Alex started talking. You told him you were upset because I guess you and zack talked about after tour and he said he's going straight home and won't be able to see you for about a month unless you go to him. He apparently said it in a not so nice manner. So. Yeah." Zack and I fought. And I haven't answered him. He's in soundcheck. I have to perform. I won't see him until after the show basically which gives me two hours to apologize before he goes to bed most likely. And then we go out separate ways.

Olivia Rose Dawson, you fucked up.