Another Practical Guide to the Logic, Philosophy, and Thoughts of Christianity

Section 1 - Article 1

outside one's marriage, regardless of what one feels. The "change of heart"

or "sexual incompatibility" excuses just do not hold water in any sense. It is

the same for any crushes or attractions that do not have clear directive from

God. There should be no action or feeding of them. There has to be selfcontrol,

involving management of these desires. This is precisely what selfcontrol

is about. And the clear definitive direction has to be clear, and not

one's own delusion of seeing what they want to see.

The major difficulty in erotic relationships is that it is difficult to tell

pure good emotions from the sinful desires. How many in the world had

already failed to differentiate lust from pure sacrificial love?

It is so easy to "put asunder what God had put together" through our

own sinful desires and confusion that man really has no excuse. For the

following, I will illustrate from some examples that I have known and seen

around me.

One must first notice that the heart is vulnerable to confusion during

loneliness. All too often, the very things that destroy marriages occur during

periods of loneliness and helplessness. There is no lack of "Don Juan"

libertines (both male and female) that had exploited the loneliness of the

traveler in strange land, the lonely soul, the grieving soul recovering from

loss of loved ones or reeling from heartbreak. Human hearts are just

vulnerable at these points. While God certainly does send human comforters,

so does Satan send in the destroyer. In the vulnerable, one easily "falls in

love" or develops such feelings. One can clearly see this in how people "fall

in love" when travelling overseas, or quickly find a replacement after a

break-up or dead of spouse. It is the tendency of human nature to look for

support. If one is not wary or guarded, they end up with the destroyer.

The other worldly snare would be the concept of platonic relationship

and confidantes. Nowhere in the Bible can an example of close platonic

relationship be found. Of course friendship between the two genders is there,

and there certainly is nothing wrong with it. Did not our Lord Jesus have

friendship with Mary Magdalene who was essentially the first to see the

resurrected Lord? Did not Paul mention Priscilla (Romans 16:3) as his

fellow co-worker? Yet the problem is to expect to have close confidantes in

a platonic relationship, worse still outside marriage. No spouse should have

a confidante outside the marriage. The purpose of marriage is to be one.

There is already no good outcome from the complaining spouse who brings