One Direction // One Shots

Niam :: Tell Me Why

Niall was on top of the world when Liam asked him out. He remembers Liam taking his hand and smiling, his eyes happy and locked on Niall's. He took a deep breath, nervous, and told Niall he liked him. Then he asked Niall to go out with him.

Niall also remembers almost fainting, only he didn't. He smiled really big and said yes, crushing his lips against Liam's. He remembers Liam holding him tight and smiling into their kiss, his smile mixing with Niall's. Niall remembers feeling amazing, remembers how he would keep that beautiful moment in his mind until the day he died.

Now, Niall's in the hospital for attempted suicide, and the thought of his and Liam's beautiful moment was not making him feel any better. It would if only he wouldn't think about everything that happened after the first two blissful months of being with Liam.

"Hey." Harry walked into Niall's hospital room, opening the door then closing it gently. He walked over to Niall's bed and sat down in a chair next to him, placing a hand over Niall's. "Are you okay? Hungry? Tired? How are you holding up?"

Niall didn't say anything. He looked at Harry with that blank expression on his face, then he looked away, his head turned up towards the ceiling. Harry sighed and squeezed Niall's hand. Niall wanted to pull his hand away, but he also didn't want to move.

"Niall, I-I want to know what happened." Harry said. "I know you don't actually talk to your therapist. I know you're not actually getting help. Please, Niall, please, I want to help you. I-I know you loved Liam, and I know he hurt you, but-but I don't know what you went through. Tell me. Tell someone. I want to help you- I want you to get help."

Niall listened, but he didn't respond. He continued staring up at the ceiling with a blank expression, his eyes stinging with tears that wouldn't come. He gulped as Harry trailed a hand up his arm, leaning forward and pressing a kiss on his neck.

"Niall?" Harry asked. Niall didn't feel Harry's lips moving, forming the word that came out of his neck. But Niall felt the lips, felt them moving over his neck and kissing him gently. The tears came, washing over his cheeks and soaking into Harry's hair.

"Niall? Niall, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Harry asked. He let go of Niall's hand and stood up. Niall still felt Harry's lips on his neck, only they weren't there. Because Harry was standing up, and Niall could see him there. Nobody else was in the room. It was in Niall's mind, and Niall tried to tell himself that. It isn't real. It isn't happening.

"Niall? Niall! What's wrong? Calm down, tell me what's wrong. Niall, please. Please." Harry said, wiping tears off of Niall's cheeks and trying to keep him down. Niall was writhing, now, flailing around and crying heavily, struggling to get away from the lips that weren't actually on his neck.

"Niall! Fuck, fuck." Harry's voice was getting distant in Niall's mind, and Niall was melting into a memory. Harry's lips weren't on his neck, Harry wasn't forcefully pinning him down and ripping off his clothes. Liam was.

"Liam, no. No no no no. Get off, get off. Please get off. Please leave me alone. Liam." Niall sobbed out. Niall could hear Harry's voice, faint, "Liam's not here, Niall, please stop crying. Calm down. It's okay, it's okay," but he heard Liam's voice better. "Stop fucking squirming, you ugly piece of shit. You're lucky I'm fucking you."

"No!" Niall shouted, and Harry finally got to him, ripping Niall out of his memory. He fell limp, weak in Harry's tight grip. Harry stayed there for a moment, didn't loosen his grip. But Niall showed no signs of freaking out again, so he did let go, moving his hand to Niall's cheek, running his thumb over the dry tears.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked. Niall sniffled, then he nodded, wiping at his eyes. He was shaking, his heart beating hard. He felt somewhat okay, though, because Harry was running a hand through his hair and touching him gently. Gently.

"Liam's not here." Harry reminded him, leaning down and kissing Niall's nose gently. "It's just me, you, Louis, and Zayn. Right now, it's just me and you. Me and you and you're safe. I won't let anything hurt you, okay? I love you."

For the first time in months, Niall smiled. He scoot over in his hospital bed and pat the now empty spot beside him for Harry. Harry gave Niall a little smile and lay down with him. He didn't bother to get under the blanket. He just slipped an arm under Niall's shoulders and held him close, kissing the top of his head again.

Harry let things remain silent, let Niall fall asleep, peaceful, in his arms. He let himself kiss Niall's cheeks, let himself enjoy Niall's presence, let himself get close, too close, to Niall. He let himself be selfish and image Niall as his; imagine sweeping Niall off his feet. He allowed himself to imagine him and Niall together, allowed himself to dream about Niall being his. He allowed himself to be selfish for just a little while, knowing that, in the morning, he would have to abandon those thoughts and take to comforting the boy who didn't love him for reasons he knew little about.

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So ?? This was kind of one-sided narry, not really niam. I didn't think it would turn out this way but I kind of liked how it did turn out, so I'm posting it anyways. Merry (Almost) Christmas!