I Fell And You Caught Me | Tyler Joseph X Reader

Night.

Triggering for some readers.

"(Y/n), you aren't good enought for him."

"He wants someone stable."

"He doesn't want to tend to your every need, stop pestering him with your existense."

"How have you two made it almost a whole year? You're such a big issue."

"He doesn't love you, (Y/n). You know that."

They whisper.

It whispers.

I don't know what it is, but it follows me. Everywhere.

I try to block it out, but I can always hear it.

Always.

I remember...

I remember why.

Why I did it.

Why I jumped.

This... This voice, it wants me dead. I let it get to me.

It never let me sleep.

Why can't I sleep?

I've seen that phrase somewhere, but where?

Oh, yes.

The suicide note that I had kept safely under my sheet. 

The voice, though, it's right. I'm nothing but a pain. Tyler shouldn't have to drag me around all the time. 

I'm useless.

Worthless.

I don't deserve him.

He deserves someone better.

"Don't you remember? Earlier? You saw knives in the kitchen. Let's put those to good use, (Y/n). I know you want to," the voice whispered.

I do.

I do want to.

I walked out into the kitchen and turned the light on.

A glimmer of light shown out of the corner of my eye. The reflection of light off of the blade.

I took it, examining it's features.

Silver, sharp. 

Clean.

I pressed the cold blade to my wrist, carefully carving the word "Sleep" into my skin. 

I did the same to the rest of my arm.

My hand.

My stomach.

Legs.

Every slice reminding me of how disgusting I am as a person.

And finally, I weakly held the knife to where my heart lie beneath my skin and bones. I felt the blood oozing ou of the rest of my body.

This is for you, Tyler. I'm sorry. So sorry.

I carved a broken-heart shaped hole in my chest, about 5 inches wide and 1 inch deep, and then, somehow, taking the last of my strength to write "Tyler" underneath.

I dropped the blade and fell to the floor, unable to move. 

I heard noises, a voice. Not the unkown voice.

Tyler's.

I heard his footsteps walking toward me.

He spoke, "You deserved this, (Y/n). (Y/n), do you here me?"

My mind woke up, and I heard muffled screaming.

"(Y/n)?! (Y/n) can you hear me?! What's wrong?!" 

Tyler.

I'm screaming into my pillow.

I calm down and look at Tyler, tears in my eyes.

I look down to see no cuts. No damage to my body.

It was a dream.

"(Y/n)?" Tyler asked.

I couldn't say anything, so I just hugged him. He gave me a tight squeeze and held on to me.

"Okay, it's okay. Shh," he calmly whispered.

"I-I'm sorry.."

"(Y/n), it's okay. You don't need to apologize."

I nodded and calmed my breathing, letting go of Tyler. 

"Where are Mark and Josh?"

"They went to go get us all breakfast. It's five in the morning. We're leaving to set up the stage soon. Are you alright?"

"Yeah. Just a bad dream."