𝙸𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚎 | Divergent

Chapter 8

Visiting Day seemed like a vague occasion in the future, between my departure from Abnegation and trying not to be killed in initiation I hadn't had much time to think about it. Now it was here it was all my brain could circle with a frustrating compulsiveness.

Marcus may chose to show up today, a thought that made me sick to my stomach. There was nothing I could do to stop it, I could refuse to see him or hide away from him, but that was not brave. If I wanted to face my fear I would have to see him if he arrived.

Bravery is not the absence of fear but the ability to act despite it.

I changed silently into a pair of loose fitting sweatpants and a well worn tee shirt, slowly, I bent over, wincing as pain flashed along my side, I pulled on my trainers and tightened the laces, the canvas fitted snugly to my feet and I wrapped the excess lace around my ankles before securing them with bows.

Apparently, I was not the only person struggling with Visiting Day. When I entered the training room I found Tobias in front of the punching bags, either he hadn't heard me over the sound of his fists and feet hitting the leather or he didn't care, I carried on walking until I was visible in his peripheral vision.

"Do you mind if I join you?" I asked, leaning against the bag next to him.

My brother raised an eyebrow and rearranged the tapes and bandages that covered his hands. "Are you sure that's a smart idea?"

I glanced down and my bruised knuckles, my fight with Mason was five days ago but the doctor had said that it would a month or so to heal my broken ribs, I would still have to fight in two days time if I wanted to remain in Dauntless.

"You have nothing to prove to me, Sasha." Tobias wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I pressed my head against his chest "so what are you trying to prove to yourself and is this the way to do it?"

Shrugging, I let myself relax into the hug, Tobias' hugs always reminded me of when we were children and we hadn't quite seen how cruel the world could be.

The door to the training room opened again and I glanced behind to see Eric, he was wearing a pair of sweat-shorts and looked like he'd just been on a run, he spotted me and Tobias together and frowned.

Tobias let his arms fall from my shoulders and crossed them over his chest.

"Initiate, you have the day off." Eric stated in a hard tone. "What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep so I came here." I narrowed my eyes "is that an issue?"

Tobias' lip turned upwards slightly.

Eric raised an eyebrow before turning to my brother. "Is there an issue, Four?"

The way Eric said his name made it sound like there was something threatening underneath his words, I couldn't tell if it was the leaders usual power play or something malicious aimed at Tobias, but the way my brother reacted made me angry, he stood, tense and jaw clenched, as he waited for Eric to continue.

Smirking, Eric seemed satisfied with his warning and walked out.

"What was that about?" I asked, staring at the door which Eric had just shut behind him.

"Nothing," Tobias threw one last punch at the bag before catching it so it didn't crash back into him.

Shaking my head, I pushed myself up onto the edge of the ring and watched silently as my brother unwrapped his hands, grimacing as he popped his knuckles.

"You know, last year I was terrified of Marcus coming here." Tobias explained, playing with a loose thread on his shorts. "It took a while, but slowly I learnt who I was and what I was capable of in Dauntless, and that power started to outweigh the fear. Over time there were more things that separated me from him than connected me."