Miraculous Falls Vs The Forces of Evil

A Spot of Bother

((A/N: Guys it's back! Long time no update, huh! Well basically I hit mass writer's block but thank you Journal 3 and the Edinburgh Fringe for re-igniting my mystery drive! So here comes update galore as well as TWO NEW STORIES!!! (Maybe three if I'm feeling kind :3) First will be 'Intern', a Gravity Falls/Danny Phantom crossover and second comes 'Monster Falls - Empire', the sequel to Kidnapped! (Possibly a Doctor Who/Gravity Falls story idk yet ;3) Anyway, I hope you enjoy Alya's first job at narrating and fourth wall breaking!))

~~Alya~~

(Okay...wait? What's going on now? Oh yeah, I forgot it's my turn to narrate! Sorry I was miles away there...anyway...where are we now? Ah, yes I remember! Sorta hard to forget being in this situation!)

I looked around me. Dipper was slumped down on the floor, panting heavily, strain evident on his face. "Guys...plan...now...please..." he groaned. Mabel and Star finally let go of me (Thank heavens! No, seriously you have no idea how awkward it is when a complete stranger nearly chokes you!) and stumbled to the floor. My brain began to devilishly knit a little plan together - at least what seemed like a good plan to me. "Listen, this girl's got a plan! I know that my plan requires a certain spotted lady who has made herself scarce but I know she'll come. Until that time, Dipper, you need to keep that shield up for as long as possible. Mabel, you and I will need to protect your brother at all costs as we move. Star, you need to be at the front, wipe out any obstacles - tell us all you can about that villain too, you seemed to know him." 

Dipper didn't sound to happy about his role (I swear I heard him mutter, "Helvete." under his breath - I don't know what it means...) but Star and Mabel seemed fully onboard with my idea. "Let's roll out!" I commanded in my most commanding voice. (Man it feels good being in charge! Who knew that narrating a chapter is so fun - well besides the fact that the author will kill me if she finds out I'm communicating with the reader directly, but who cares?!) And with that, Mabel and I scooped up Dipper - with his feeble noodle arms - then began to move forward as fast as we could. Meanwhile, Star ran forward, pushing the shield forward with all her might. 

We were making good progress! Well, we were until Dipper passed out from exhaustion and his shield flickered out like a candle being extinguished. "Now we're dead." Mabel pointed out usefully. (Or not...do you guys like my sarcasm? I'm thinking I might use this style on my LadyBlog?) Star backed in against us, as once again bone zombies began to close in. One of them seized the Mewnian princess by the arm (turns out that spending an hour in a portaloo is a great way for someone to tell you their entire life story, who knew?). "Star!" I yelled, but it was too late. No matter how much she tried to shake it off, it sank its rotted teeth into her flesh, causing Star to call out in pain - yet she remained unaffected? (Huh, maybe it's just a Mewni thing?) "Ow! Now that's not very nice!" she responded and kicked it. This, however seemed like a bad idea as this only aggravated them further. 

"Looks like you guys need a hand!" 

Ladybug! About time too! The superheroine raised her eyebrows, swinging down to join us. "Or you could say that this cat-astrophe isn't very humerus!" Chat Noir chortled as he gracefully landed beside Ladybug. She didn't seem to take kindly to his pun, giving him a deep elbow in the stomach. But she composed herself again and calmly took the reigns of control from me. "Chat, if you'll do me the honours of a cataclysm. I have an idea." 

"Certainly my lady!" he replied gallantly. Mabel seemed dumbfounded by Chat. "Do you have that guy's number?" she whispered to me. I simply rolled my eyes and cowered behind the heroes. A glowing mass raised from the ground, forming into a humanoid shape. Karate Master.

"Perfect timing Mr. Akumatised Villain!" Chat teased. 

"That's Karate Master to you!" 

"CHAT JUST USE YOUR POWER ALREADY!" Ladybug screamed impatiently - clearly tiring of spinning her yo-yo round as a shield against the bone things. 

"Geez, Ladybug you need to lay off the attitude! But if it will please you Bugaboo, I will use my power." Noir clicked his fingers as Karate Master prepared to attack with Star's wand, Chat plunged his hand to the ground screaming, "CATACLYSM!" 

The cobbles fell away and we, the zombies and Karate Master all tumbled into the catacombs - which were noticeably empty. "Now what?" Mabel asked, slinking up to Chat's side, completely infatuated by him. I remained on the floor with Dipper. Star hung her head gently and sobbed, clutching her bite tightly. "I'm so sorry Marco..." 

(What is this the end of the chapter already?! Aw man! Can I do the next one too? No? Okay...but I can narrate again? Only if the readers like me...well....do you guys like me? Please say yes ;-D I'll give you a free cookie if you do!)