"Can we talk?" I asked him over the phone. He stayed silent for awhile but I knew he was still there because of his heavy breathing.
"It's okay if you're busy. I just need to talk to you about some things." I added. He sighed before clearing his throat, "Nah, it's cool. Where you want to meet at?" I looked around at my surroundings and smiled, "The park?"
He hung up after agreeing to meet me here. The pounding in my heart never ceased as I looked down at a picture of Rich. I think it's time that I take responsibility for my actions.
He deserves to know and as selfish as I want to be, I can't keep him to myself forever. Now is the time to lay it all out and whatever happens, happens. This is my fault in all honesty.
-
I looked out my window looking at nothing in particular as Rihmeek drove us to Richard's.
Today makes four months that we have been together. It feels like so much longer though. These last few months have been the best yet.
I never knew I was capable of loving someone as much I do him. The feeling is indescribable. All I know is that I am the happiest I have ever been and I have him to thank for that.
"I love you." I said randomly, as I took his hand and held it with both of my own.
"Love you too." I'll never get tired of hearing him say it. "What?" He questioned once he noticed me staring at him. "Nothing."
He narrowed his eyebrows while driving as he quickly glanced at me once more. "What you up to? That lil smirk means something."
I laughed at the fact he could see right through me. "I'm not up to anything. I just love you, that's all." I halfway lied. He mumbled an "mhm" before we fell back into a comfortable silence. Richard left to stay at his lake house for the night leaving the house for Rihmeek and I. My parents think I'm staying with a friend so I get to spend the night with him.
"You want me to make you something?" He asked. "No I'm okay."
"Alright, well, I'm gonna take a shower." He said. I smirked but he couldn't see because his back was turned towards me. "Can I take one with you?" He chuckled before turning around. I wasn't joking. "Nah, not today, Nic. You ain't ready for that." I rolled my eyes. I'm never ready for anything. Every time I try to do anything he tells me that we should wait, that we have all the time in the world to do that. It's excuse after excuse.
I chose not to say anything and let him be. While he took a shower I did what I do best, snoop around. I've never looked through his things before. I opened his dresser and found exactly what I was subconsciously looking for.
In a gold wrapped there laid condoms. I felt silly after finding them but I wanted to know.
"What are you doing?" He asked, catching me red handed. I jumped and turned around, "You scared me." He smirked before shaking his head. "I was going through your stuff, what does it look like?" He laughed at my honesty before sitting on his bed.
I took time to admire his bare chest, and chiseled abs. If there's one thing I know for sure, it is that my man is fine.
I walked towards him and stood between his legs. "I love you." I said for the millionth time today. "I love you too."
I pecked his lips three times before resting my chin on top of his head. "What do you want to do?" He asked. "Anything I want to do, you say I'm not ready for, so, what can I do, daddy?" I felt his body tense slightly causing me to smirk. "Hm?" I hummed.
He continued to stay silent as his face was placed in my cleavage. "We have the house to ourselves all night long." I whispered.
Once I wasn't satisfied with the reaction I was getting I pulled away and looked down at him. "So what do you want to do?"
He smirked before grabbing me at the bend of my knees and pulled me onto his lap, "I want to fuck the shit out of you." He said, literally taking my breath away. I've never heard him say something so explicit before and I've never heard his voice so deep and rough. This was way past the point of turning me on.
"Do it." I said, our faces only inches apart.
"I can't." He said as he picked me up and laid me beside him. "Rihmeeeeek!" I yelled while throwing a temper tantrum like a child.
"You're an ass, you know that? I can't stand you." I said, meaning every word but he seemed to take it as a joke. "It's not funny. You're always teasing me and shit. Say shit like that, why don't you back it up? I'll do what I say."
He laughed even harder this time. He even went as far as throwing his head back.
I crossed my arms and glared at him. Nothing about this was the least bit funny.
"Is my baby mad?" He asked. Obviously. It might be different if this were the first time but no this is the fourth time this week.
"You're so annoying." I said, rolling my eyes.
He chuckled before laying beside me.
"What you want me to do?" He asked. I didn't even bother getting my hopes up. I shrugged my shoulders and stayed silent.
"Kiss me." He said. I shook my head and sucked in my bottom lip to keep me from smiling. "Kiss me, Nic." I looked at him for a split second before looking back towards his wall. "No, I'm not ready." I said.
I felt him kiss my cheek before placing kisses on my jawline down to my neck. "Stop, Rihmeek." I said, "If you don't want to do anything with me that's fine but you have to stop getting my hopes up."
He pulled away and looked me in the eyes.
"I want to, Nic. I just don't want to hurt you. It's going to hurt and that's what I'm avoiding. Trust me, I want you too." He said.
I stared at him as he rubbed the inside of my thigh. Letting out small whimpers here and there. I wanted to stop him but it felt so good.
"You're so beautiful." He said, never breaking eye contact. "Rihmeek.." I whined, while pulling at his shirt. "What?" The smirk that crossed his face let me know he already knew what I wanted. "Please." I watched as his eyes darken as his hand moved up my thigh. The closer it got to where I wanted it, the more my heart beat increased. This is the closest I've ever been with a guy so this is all new to me.
"Are you sure? I don't want to hurt you."
I nodded my head with no hesitation, "I need it." I said. He leaned down and pressed his lips against mine and I took it upon myself to deepen it. It happened in a blur but soon my shirt was off and I was left in nothing but my panties. "That feels so good." I said as he kissed all over my body. He took my left nipple into his mouth and I swear I seen stars.
"Rihmeeek.." I moaned as he ran two fingers over my panties. "You're soaked." He said in a voice I didn't recognize. I started to become frustrated with the slow pace he was going.
He pulled my panties down and soon I felt him run his fingers slightly over my second pair of lips causing my legs to twitch.
"You want it?" He taunted. "Yes!" I cried out. He stuck one finger inside me, taking my breath away. "Ah." I moaned. I've never felt such a sensation in my life. This feeling is heavenly, pure bliss. "You're so tight."
Soon he found a steady pace and I was crying out to anyone who cared to listen. I'm sure nothing I said made sense. Nothing at the time made sense. "Oh this feels good." I said. Opening my eyes was a task in itself but once I made eye contact with him, that was enough to send me over the edge. "Kiss me." I said.
He did as told and within seconds of kissing him I experienced my first orgasm. It was nothing short of the best feeling in my life.
"That was-I can't believe...I love you." I said, coping with that earth shattering experience.
Only minutes after my first I was already ready for another. Rihmeek kissed me but this time it was full of passion and hunger. He spread my legs placed himself between them. "I want to feel that again" I said more to myself than him. He then stood up and pulled down his sweatpants. My eyes never left the bulge that was begging to be let free.
"How many Rihmeek?" I still never tore my eyes away from his huge erection.
"A few." He said, already knowing what I was talking about. "I've never been with a virgin though. So you're my first."
I felt foolish for feeling special but he is my first and in a way I am his first too.
-
Till this day that is one of my favorite memories. That night definitely changed our relationship forever, it was a night I know neither of us will ever forget.
I heard a car door shut so I turned around to find Rihmeek walking towards me. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for what was to come. "How long have you been here?" He asked. "A couple hours." He nodded his head and took a seat beside me.
"It's been awhile since we've been here together." I stated like he didn't already know.
I watched from the corner of my eye nod his head then sit back. "How are you?" I asked.
I worry about him a lot. He's not one to express emotion, feelings, or anything really. Something can be eating him alive on the inside and he'll never mention a word about it.
"I've been good, chillin." I didn't expect anything different. "Omelly told me that you moved." I questioned more than stated.
"Houses, yeah. I still live here in Philly though." I don't know why him still living here made me so happy but it did. "I'm still living out in California." I said as if he cared.
"Is that where you ran off to?" I had an idea he already knew but I nodded my head anyways. Avoiding a fight for as long as possible seems like the smarter decision. "It's nice out there. If you come visit sometime I can show you around." I immediately regret what I said. Of course he wouldn't want to come "visit."
"Yeah, right." He said followed by a chuckle.
I picked up the picture of Rich and smiled. For a split second I forgot where we were, forgot what was going on, and focused on the only light in my life. "This is..uh, Rich." Truthfully I didn't know where to start. I can't imagine this conversation going over pleasant whatsoever.
"I seen pictures of him and Richard back at the house." Rihmeek said not even bothering to look at the picture. "Yeah, Rich loved him."
He nodded his head, still acting as if I wasn't holding the picture. "From all the times I heard Richard talk about him, he loved him too."
What he said touched me. Not that I didn't already know that. I'm just so glad they were able to bond the way I wanted them to.
"He's a great boy." I said, "He loves it here too."
I laughed, remembering all the times I had to fight with him to leave. "Smart boy."
I looked at the picture lost for words. I don't know what to say now. Hey, he is yours.
He takes after you. Is there a right way to hurt someone like that? I just put the picture away since he showed no interest in it.
"What did you have to talk about?" He asked.
I took a deep breath then exhaled before running a hand through my hair. "I wanted to apologize, actually." I figured I would start off easy. "For my father." I laughed, but nothing was funny. It's actually sad, honestly pathetic. Anyone could sense the tension between us. Talking about my parents is never an easy topic.
"What are you apologizing for?" He asked.
I shook my head, "I don't know, everything."
Where do I begin? There is a list of all the problems they have caused, all the torment they have put him through. "I'm sorry that you've had to go through all of this because of me." I said. I felt a number of emotions wash over me as I remembered everything he went through just to be with me. He sacrificed everything for me. "You don't have to apologize." He said. "Thanks, but I do. I'm the reason you ever got into this mess."
He shrugged his shoulders. He would never put blame on me, or admit that my parents bother him. I have known him long enough to know though and whether it is my fault or not, he deserves for someone to apologize.
"That all? I have to be somewhere." He said after sliding his phone back into his pocket.
"Oh, yeah, go on." I said. There was so much more that I wanted to say, and it was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't spit it out. Instead I watched as he stood up and started to walk away. "Oh, yeah," He said, "How old is your son, Rich?" I stood up and turned around to face him. "He turns six this year."
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A/N
Thoughts on the half ass sex scene?
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Please excuse any errors 😘
