The smile-less girl

Eight

A solicitous feeling began setting inside of me as I started regretting raging out on him. I'm naturally just really untrustworthy. I block people out... People who can help.

Next, it's realisation. I kicked him out of his own room. I'm officially stunned and embarrassed. How could I be so socially awkward?

I touched my upper body to feel my uniform; I must really not trust Jungkook enough and it's making me feel distraught. The desire in me to have a friend who is one call away, who will always listen to my problem is overtaking me slowly.

Amidst my Contemplation, I heard slight knocks. They were significantly reserved. It was Jungkook.

I mutter some words in reply, to hushed to be heard, but surprisingly he responds because the door slowly opens.

"Yeri I'm sorry. I-I didn't expect you would mind it so much. I wouldn't do anything to you, Yeri. Never. It didn't even cross my mind. Please forgive me. Please?" His hands make contact with each other. He must have his hands in a praying position.

"Jungkook" I pause for a second "you don't even have to apologise. It's really stupid of you. But I'm stupid too. I shouldn't have reacted like that. I just thought something um- you know- happened. So we can be stupid together, how does that sound?" I tried to smile, but I don't think it worked. I'm gonna work hard, though. To finally release a sincere goofy grin...

"That sound great actually" he chuckles and his light-hearted tone of voice rings through my ears.

"Hey, what's your address Jungkook? I have to call my mum" I began dialling my mother's number from my blazer pocket while multitasking; remembering Jungkook's address. I'm positive she will be stunned and furious.

Let me tell you it took me a substantial amount of time to remember the position of the keypad numbers on the phone. I didn't have no iPhone or some jazz up-to-date technology, just some plain old Nokia my mum got for me because the numbers of the buttons are 3d so I can scan through then and press what I need. Back to my mum, she'll probably go as far as thinking I had a one night stand with Jungkook.

She picks up after a couple of rings.

Once I explain the unavoidable situation. She doesn't seem too and-

"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING? YOU ARE SO GROUNDED"

Yep, that's my mum.

I can hear her slurping up the remaining sips of the coffee before releasing a sigh.

"Alright fine. I'll be there"

Then awkward silence really fell in between me and Jungkook. And I wanted it to end but I didn't know what to talk about. I think I began feeling so hot from the awkwardness (I get really nervous in these situations) that my skin was damp enough to cook noodles.

"So..." He starts

"So..." I reply.

Great. Just absolutely, amazingly, astonishingly, great.

"I'm sorry I fell asleep. I don't think I noticed the effects that being deprived of sleep for three days could have on a person. And also that time in the garden. I fell asleep there, too"

"Well, then why didn't you wake up when I shook you? And you were also really damp as if you had a high temperature"

I was quite shocked. I honestly did feel as if I was stuck in some coma at that time.

"I get that a lot" I lied.

I'm always feeling insecure when I'm with Jungkook but at the same time, I feel like life couldn't get any better. His simple gestures make me feel a fuzzy feeling inside. I don't know where to look when I'm talking to him or just anyone in general. It's really challenging especially when the person asks what you're looking at when in fact, you thought you were staring at them.

I heard an obnoxious crash and immediately flinched.

"Yah Kim Taehyung, Jeon Junghyun!" Jungkook shouts placing his hands around the edges of his mouth creating a megaphone effect.

"I'm sorry for all the yelling" Jungkook takes a long sigh "you see I have to live with two idiots: one, my supposedly "best friend" and the other my blood sibling. Now trust me sharing the same blood is the only thing in common" I was "this"close to laughing but I refrained again.

"Why is Taehyung-shi here?"

"Well it's a long story and I don't think I'm allowed to tell you" he fidgets a before speaking again "yet".

"I understand" then silence again. I was content though that he thought we could be close enough in the future for him to tell me about Taehyung. But it's just not compatible. IM not compatible with anyone. That is was upsets me most. If someone finds out, spreads it around like fire or Chinese whispers, I'll have no choice to move school: for the dozenth time.

Shouts and muttered curses were thrown across the house as Taehyung and Junghyun fought.

"Are they always like this?"

"You bet" he sighs and I can feel the bed shift and adjust to the newly weight put upon it. Jungkook sat down next to me.

"Do you need anything?"

"Nope, I'm alright. Thanks for the offer, though. My mum should be here any minute now"

"How does it feel to have a mum,Yeri?"

That question caught me off guard. It reached me that he doesn't have a mum. But I knew better than to pity him. I hated that feeling and especially when one receives it, which is in fact, partially the reason I hide that I'm blind. "I'm so sorry" isn't really going to change anything and will make Jungkook's life seem terrible in his eyes and mine. No pun intended.

"I don't get to... see my mum a lot. She's quite busy with work. But when she is at home, I don't feel as lonely"

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked that. It was quite stupid of me" I hear him rubbing his face with one hand- probably out of frustration- and then he releases a sigh. I know he wants to cry. I can sense it.

But what I've realised is that people hate revealing their emotions. They just stay in their systems till their toxic. But what's ironic is that people voice what they hate. I often here gossips from the girls behind me in math class always and I mean non-stop, talk about people. Horrible, snarky and degrading comments. I tried many times to stop them but they just laugh with those annoyingly squeaky voices. If I didn't know it was them, I'd probably think it's some mouse on steroids.

"Remember? I'm stupid with you. You can tell me anything. I think you know by now that I won't tell anyone because... Well I've got no one to tell and I'm not that type of girl" he laughs at my confession. It was a heartfelt laugh; not a mouse-on-steroids kind of laugh.

"I know. You're not like other girls"

"Is that a good thing?"

"Yes, totally. Unless you wanna classify yourself as a barbie who has daily flings with the basketball team"

"Yep that's definitely not me"

Soon after a period of awkward silence the door bell rings.

"That must be your mum. I'll call her here especially since you're still so weak"

I sighed heavily with relief thanking god I didn't have to walk to the unknown door by myself. I nod zealously as a reply.

"Oh my god, is my baby okay? Yeri?!" I could hear my mum gasping for air and Jungkook trying to introduce himself but being continuously cut off by my overly protective mother.

"Mum?!"

Her heels clattered on the floor which was most probably wooden.

"Oh, my Yeri. What did that boy do to you?"

Her hands wandered around to find any abnormalities.

"Mum, I'm fine. That boy is my friend, he saved me"