I could feel the coldness from outside almost washing over my skin, as I sat across from his bed in silence.
Last night was intense and due to the emotional raw outburst that had spat out from my soul, I figured it would be best to stay over at Beau's, it was a lonely night after I practically had to force Beau to go to bed, of course he was tired as hell but he had fought his slumber by trying to ignore the alluring voice of its call, and Zara had failed to come home, not that I was worried but that had made his house more peaceful than anything.
My thoughts and I were all that was awake at the dark hours of the morning, refusing to let me go by keeping me hostage in the one thing I could never escape,
My mind.
I now sat here in the dead silence of this house feeling the dim sun pierce through the window as I held a pencil in my hand just watching Beau sleep like an angel, his topless body laying lazily over his bed while his hair looked perfectly imperfect. One of Beau's blank books had rested on my lap as I traced the outline of his features drawing him as he slept while I focused comfortably in his t-shirt siting on a wooden chair that I had carried from his lounge all the way to his bedroom.
The pencil sound was the only thing I could hear as I shaded parts of his face and then lifted the pencil bottom up to my lip as my teeth rolled it while my mind tried to figure out how I would draw his messy hair and capture it perfectly, he was beautiful in all forms, every fiber, every part of him was put together with such thought and reason, such precision and beauty, God had taken his time to create him,
There was really no other explanation.
I watched them slowly open like clouds in the sky separating to reveal the sun,
The sun's beneath his clouds were blue like two drops from the ocean's color and then he smiled a dopey smile before yawning,
his smile making me smile.
"Good morning." I said sweetly as I dropped my pencil while he stretched out and then whispered "Good morning." As he blinked, smiling, staring at me as I stared back at him, for a moment we were just silent looking at each other and then he spoke,
"You're drawing?" He asked in his husky sleepy voice scrunching up a pillow.
"Yeah, it helps me deal with frustration and emotions." I nodded and then he asked,
"You feeling any better?"
"Yeah," I spoke honestly and then sighed "I'm sorry for her treating you like you're a monster." I spoke and then he smiled waving it off.
"Don't be sorry, it's okay." He said "I've been viewed as a monster almost all of my life."
"But that doesn't mean you should let her treat you like that!" I raised my voice, my eyes narrow "let anyone treat you like that. Not her! Not the people at school not anyone!" I stood up from my seat still holding the notebook, seeing the tears fog my vision.
I suppose my emotions had kicked back in and I was well on my way to make my thoughts my words.
"It's okay! It doesn't affect me!" He said lifting himself up from his bed.
"But it affects me!" I screamed
"Don't fucking do this, don't argue with me first thing in the morning."
"Why do you do that!?" I screamed throwing my hands up.
"Do what Shelby!?" His voice began to thicken as he stepped closer, I noticed the veins in his neck as he said those words.
"Allow people to treat you like you're less than them, like you're nothing, like you don't have feelings!" Tears streamed down my face "don't stand there and lie to me and tell me that it doesn't affect you!" I shook my head in disbelief because for the first time I didn't believe him "you're good at ignoring it, ignoring them but you're a liar if you tell me that last night, my mother treating you like that, was nothing!"
