A Small World

Explosion

I run into my dorm and slam the door shut. I turn around with tears streaming down my face as I slide down the door in anger and fustration. "Stop slamming the door," May hisses. I'm not in the mood for her.

"Leave me alone!" I shout before walking over to my bed and falling down on it. I bury my face into my pillow, crying. I have no idea why. I guess hearing words like that really hit me. But I'm also crying because it was from my teacher who I somewhat have feelings for, but I know it can never be between us. I just wish this feeling could run away. No boy has ever said I mattered the way he did. And with all the emotions I have, it really hit me.

I lift my head from my pillow and look at my clock. I've been crying for nearly two hours now. I bury my head back into my pillow as I continue to cry. "Okay I can't take all thus crying anymore. What's wrong Ace?" May asks from her side of the room.

"Nothing," I sniffle a little. "I'm going for a walk." I get up and change into shorts and a hoodie in the bathroom. I grab my phone and earphones and leave the room. I blast Hold On Til May by Pierce the Veil as I exit the building and walk outside. I'm still crying, but not as much. I pull my hood up over my face and continue walking with no where specific in mind.

I finally reach a field that I've never been to before. There's a few guys playing football. I find a big tree which seems good enough to climb. I launch myself up, gripping onto ghe thick branch closest to the ground and boost myself up. I climb all the way to the top which is like a good 30 feet high. I sit on a sturdy branch and turn my music up, turning on Drown by Bring Me The Horizon because that song basically describes my life. I find a comfortable position to lay and close my eyes as a few tears escape my eyes. After a few minutes I calm down and stop crying. I let out a very loud sigh of relief, anger, sadness, and guilt. Sometimes I wish I didn't think as much as I did now because it really does end up biting me in the ass sooner or later. And right now it's sooner then later.

I sit up and look at the ground. There's four guys just standing there looking at me. What's their problem? I take out an ear bud and I look at them. "Can I help you?" I question them in a dried up, low voice.

"What are you doing up there?" The strawberry colored haired boy lifts an eyebrow up. I ignore them and jump out of the tree, landing on both my hands and left knee.

"Nothing," I spit out with as much breath I can push out. I'm still shaken up and recovering from all my crying.

"Are you really okay? I mean your eyes are bloodshot red and your voice is very raspy."

"I'm fine," I try to walk past them but two of the guys block me.

"You've been crying. What's wrong?"

"I said nothing!" I cry out. Tear start to spill out of my eyes. A jet black haired colored boy pulls me into him arms and strokes my hair as I cry into his shirt like I did earlier to Mr- fuck! He's the reason I'm crying. Why did he have to mess me up like this? That's just the icing on the cake to set me off the edge. I wouldn't be crying into a strangers shirt. I pull myself together after a few minutes. I pull myself away from his shirt and they all look at me.

"Tell us what's wrong please?" The boy I was crying on pleads.

"Just some guy problems." I stop talking to catch my breath. It feels like I'm running miles on end.

"Care to tell us?"

"I really can't. I'm sorry. I have to go," I get out of their grips and run. I don't wanna go back to my room. And it's only 6. My legs take a detour and I run to the guys building instead. I run up the flight of stairs to floor three, room 14C. I knock on the door and a sort of overweight, tall red head guy with freckles answers the door.

"Hey cutie, what's up?" He leans up against the door, trying to be cool, but it's not working.

"Where's Dime?" I look behind him to see Dime laying in bed. "Dime!" I cry out. He jumps up and sees me.

"What's wrong Ace?" He runs up and pushes the guy out the way to the point that he stumbles backwards and hugs me. I know, I'm being a big baby right now. But when I cry, it's never just one thing. It's always bottled up emotions over time and I end up exploding like this. A complete meltdown.

"I'm just so sick of my stupid emotions," I sob into his chest, holding onto him for dear life with my arms wrapped around his torso.

"Come lay down with me and calm down," he shuts the door and leads me to his bed. We both lay down and he wraps his arms tightly around me as I lay on top of him. "Now place tell me what happened?"

"I can't say because it's kind of illegal, but it wasn't anything I did. Well not exactly. I mean-"

"Ace calm down. Is it something that will get you arrested?"

"No, but it could get someone else arrested."

"Okay, don't tell me then. I dorm wanna hear about it. But I know that's not just it. What else is bothering you?"

"It's just all of my dumb bottled up emotions. This is just me exploding. I hate myself for this."

"Emotions are normal Ace."

"I know, but-"

"Just go to sleep. I'll wake up before 11 and take you to your dorm."

"Thank you Dime," I peck his cheek before laying my head back down on his chest again and closing my eyes, ready to go to sleep and forget this horrid day ever happened.

***

"Dude you have a hot chick in your bed. You need to smash," a male voice whispers. It sounds like his roommates voice.

"This is my friend dude. Piss off. I'm not going to have sex with her," Dime whispers/argues back.

"Then I will."

"You're not touching her. She's mine."

"I thought she was just a friend."

"She is. I mean she's beautiful, but-"

"She's single then?"

"Yes, but-"

"I have proven my case. I have a chance."

"I doubt it."

"True. Every guy in school is after her." I jerk up a bit. I keep my eyes closed and pretend to be asleep.

"What?"

"She's smoking dude. Every guy noticed and now they're trying to get with her and her other friend. They're popular."

"Oh no."

"Should've hit while you could. I'd regret it too if it were me."

"Not that. She hates a lot of attention. She's going to freak out." He's right. I will freak out. What if something happens and I'm in front of a big crowd? I'll get sick. I'm getting sick just thinking of it.

"Why?"

"She's still shy sometimes. She told me everything about her," I hear the smile in his voice. "I know she used to be shy and she still is sometimes."

"Well she's gonna have to deal with it. Especially with that Halloween dance in three weeks. Every guy is going to try to ask her."

"Shut up dude. I'm gonna take her to her dorm." I feel Dime position me in his arms bridal style and removes me from the room. What was that for? I'm not popular. I'm just a nobody. A loner. A loser. Why would any guy go after a girl like me? I can see it for MacKenzie. She's gorgeous. But I'm not.

Dime reaches my dorm and May opens the door after he knocks on it a few times. I'm still in his arms pretending to be asleep. I did fall asleep for a bit though.