Autistic (in the process of revision)

Mother Knows Best

Justin's POV

I rolled over after my napping and panicked when I realized that Autumn wasn't in my bed with me. She was always here for me when I slept. Where was she?

A loud bang ricocheted throughout the whole house, frightening me. I got up, shaking with fear and crept downstairs where the sound had came from. Creeping around every corner, I had realized that there wasn't an intruder in my house.

Jumping from the last few stairs, I sprinted to the kitchen to get something to eat. You know when you're so hungry, that your stomach hurts? That's what I am feeling right now.

Another crash sounded from the kitchen startling me, once again. Slowly opening the kitchen door, I heard cursing and the sound of pots and pans crashing against each other.

"Damn it. Stupid pots," my Autumn softly grumbled to herself.

She then proceeded to put a pot full of water on the stove to boil. I watched her for a couple more minutes admiring her beauty. Not noticing that I was standing there, she began to sing into a wooden spoon and dance around the kitchen in her pajamas and fluffy socks. I couldn't hold it in any more and I busted out laughing at her.

Quickly turning around, Autumn turned red in the face mumbling to herself about needing to be more aware of her surroundings. Coming up behind her, I wrapped my arms around her waist, cooing to her that it was fine.

"Hey Autumn, what are you making?" I asked

"Grits and eggs with a side of bacon," she answered smugly. She always knew she was a good cook and she made sure to show it off whenever she could.

"C-could you possibly make me some, p-please?" I scratched the back of my neck sheepishly.

It was her turn to be amused. "Hmmm.. Someone that laughed at me should get some of MY food. How about no? There are pop tarts in the pantry though if you'd like one of those," she giggled softly.

I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder. "Now are you going to make me some of your magnificent, delicious food, my little Autumn bear?" I asked her playfully. She was dangling from my arms with her head facing the ground and her feet in the air.

"Y-yes! Justin, you can have some of my food. Please let me down. My blood is rushing to my head. Please," she kept begging me.

"Okay, if you say so," I let her down gently. "Can I at least have a k-kiss for letting you down?" I pathetically questioned.

"Justin, you know it's not appropriate. I'm supposed to look after you as a guardian, not a lover. I'm sorry," she muttered looking down.

Great. I've managed to embarrass myself yet again in front of my autumn. When can I act like a normal human being that isn't being restricted by this disorder that makes me seem so stupid and helpless. Maybe if I act smarter around Autumn, if I act more mature, maybe she'll like me more. I've never wanted anyone more in my life than I want Autumn. She's the one person, besides my mommy of course, that doesn't make me feel so bad about myself. I can't imagine a life without her now that I have met her.

It had been about an hour. I finished eating my breakfast that my autumn had made for me, and now I was just sitting here at the kitchen barstool with my head down like a little puppy being scolded.

A soft pitter-patter sounded through the room as her soft tiny feet hit the kitchen tile. "J-Justin. Um-are you okay?" Autumn spoke shyly. This was the first time I had seen her so quiet around me. I wonder why she's so worried about me. No one has ever been worried about me before. People have always overlooked me, almost as if I didn't exist, so why is Autumn giving me so much attention? I'm nothing.

My voice cracked as I spoke, "yes. I'm fine. Thanks for asking,"

Her footsteps got even closer and I felt her hands on my shoulders. My body visibly relaxed and I leaned back into her touch. "J. Seriously. Tell me what's wrong. You knew from the start that we couldn't make anything of this. You're simply the boy that I am babysitting and I am the babysitter. It's nothing against you, babe. I promise. It's just simply business. I need a job to get money in order to pay my bills and live. It's life. And whether or not you are aware of life, it stops for nothing. Relationships, family, love, emotions, nothing. It's not my choice. If it was, I would be with you in a heartbeat. No doubt. But that isn't the way it is and we both need to accept that. I love you, J, but not like a girlfriend would love a boyfriend. I'm so sorry if I hurt you," her voice broke as she had tears in her eyes.

"Autumn, why can't we just be together? My mommy is never around. It's not like she would know and even if she did, so what? She would support me anyway. She has always supported me. She would want me to be happy. And I'm happy when I'm with you. And that's okay that you don't love me like a girlfriend would her boyfriend, we can learn to love. We can learn together. We've both had our fair share of heartbreaks. So we can learn together, at our own pace," I whimpered desperately trying to get Autumn to see where I was coming from.

"How do you know your mom would still employ me if we were together? How do I know that she isn't going to kick me out the second that she finds out that we are together? And then the money? I am so desperate for money right now I'm almost willing to do just about anything, Justin. I can't afford to lose this job. Ask your mom and then we'll see, but be careful how you phrase it. Tell her that you like me and you want to be with me, don't mention my feelings yet, and see how she reacts," she replies nervously.

She wants me to ask my mom if we can be together? Okay. Then be it. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number that I knew oh so well. The line rang for a few seconds before my cheery mother answered the phone.

"Hello, Justin. How is my baby boy?" She spoke giggling softly.

I blushed. "I'm doing pretty well, mommy. But I had to talk to you about something.." My voice trailed off as I tried to somehow figure out how to say the words correctly.

"Ok. What is it, honey?" She wasn't as cheery now, more so concerned.

"Well, you're the person that I come to for anything, so I wanted to talk to you for a minute."

"Go ahead. I'm all ears."

"So. I like this girl an-" I was rudely cut off by my squealing mother.

"Oh my God. Who is she?! Tell me!" She spoke cheerful, once again.

I sighed. "I don't want to say her name just yet, mommy. Just let me talk, please," I spoke politely.

"Sheesh. Sorry, sir. Continue," she replied sarcastically. I giggled. I could see her mock saluting me.

"Anyway, before I was rudely interrupted, I like this girl. She's all I think about. She makes me happy and I can't see a life without her. She's everything to me, mommy," I spoke shakily.

The line was silent for a few moments before she replied, "aw, baby, who is she? Just tell me," she was yet again concerned. She switches moods like a remote switches channels.

"Well if I tell you her name, you have to promise me not to get mad at neither her not me," I bargained.

"O-okay, Justin. You're starting to scare me, but you can tell me anything. Who is she?"

"Her name is Autumn. The Autumn that takes care of me," I spoke confidently.

And once again, the line went dead silent. And my heart sped up as I heard her reply.

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-1424 words all for you guys :)

•You're all beautifully perfect & capable of doing anything and everything that you want and that you put your mind to. Have a great day & I wish you all good luck & peace with whatever is going on in your life.•