Relationship With My Brothers Best Friend (Original)

Chapter 51.

Chapter 51.

He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. His eyes told me everything. They told me how sad he was, how crushed and heartbroken he really was. I couldn't bring myself to look away, though.

It all happened too soon. School is still in session, we have two more full months left. I thought we would have more time than this.

I am crushed. I am heartbroken. I'm beyond devastated. I hate having this feeling. The feeling of not being able to do anything but wait.

I know that this is the end. It's because of the age difference. I'm only a sophomore and then him being a senior just leaves us prone for heartbreak.

Like I said before, I knew it would happen, but you always have hope that maybe just maybe fate will change that. Fate does not seem to be on my side though.

If I could drop everything and follow him to California, would I? I've been asking myself this question for a while now. Is my love for him that strong where I would leave my best friend, brother and school?

With enough thinking I'll be able to come up with an answer, but for now that option is totally out of the question. Jackson would never let me leave with Colten.

"Nikki..." he breaths out but my eyes dart down to the floor. Not only does he sound vulnerable but he looks exactly the same. How do you look to someone you love and break their heart? You don't, but I have to. It's for the better.

"Goodbye, Colten," I choke on a sob. Colten doesn't make a move to catch me on my way towards his door. Maybe he's thinking I won't leave, he's wrong. "I'll always love you, Colten."

I had to tell him, I couldn't let him think that I had no heart. Because I do love him, and it's unbearable that I have to leave him. I won't be going to his senior prom, he won't be going to mine, it's over.

I have to begin to focus on everything else beside him.

As I walk down the stairs I feel like everything is going in slow motion. Step by step I make my way out the door to the sidewalk in front of his house. I don't turn back, I keep walking.

Did I really even break up with him? It sure sounded like I did. I can't believe I did it. I have to face the fact that I can't be selfish towards his dreams, as much as it hurts to see him go, it's for the best.

Everything is always for the best.

***

Day by day, week by week goes by.

I've been focusing on my finales, trying to ace every single one.

Studying helped me take my mind off of all the things that are wrong with my life.

Jackson got accepted to a college in Seattle, on a full Football scholarship. I was so proud of him, I can't tell you happy I am. My brother finally did something, he worked for something and earned it.

It's been his dream ever since I could remember, him wanting to play for the Seattle, Seahawks. Now he's just one step closer.

Trust me I'm upset, but the plurality of me is happy. Happy that he's living his dream. Although he's leaving both Brittni and I behind, we both accepted the fact that this is his life that he's living, and we want the best for him.

I know how Brittni feels, they didn't break up like Colten and I did, but I'm curious how they're going to make it work. With jackson being almost all the way across the country, how will they work out. I'm not doubting their relationship, hell no, I'm glad they're going strong. I just wished that Colten and I had that same passion.

"Oh come on, it's going to be the best party." Brittni whines in my ear. Jackson sitting across from me looking amused as I cover my ears with my hands to block out the voices.

"How many times do I have to tell you? I need to study. My last final is tomorrow not to mention it's Science, which I hate. I need to ace it. Go without me." I mutter the last part and look back down at my text book, rereading the same page fifty times.

I still don't understand where earthquakes come from. I know they're caused by tectonic plates colliding but I don't know if that comes from the lithosphere. Ugh!

"You've been studying all week, I'm almost positive you memorized the whole book." She tries to lighten the mood by teasing, but it's only getting me more agitated.

"For the love of God, Brittni! Go without me." I didn't mean to shout, I just was bottling it up for so long, with all the stress, it kind of just came out. I take one look at her face and see the hurt expression, but I'm not going to cower down.

"Fine, spend the rest of your life wallowing around in this god forsaken house! One day you have to get over it, okay? You'll find somebody else, you'll break up! But God dammit, you're stronger than this! Quit burying yourself in those fucking text books and enjoy life!" Brittni's face is red with anger as she throws her hands in the air with frustration.

She's one-hundred percent right, about everything. Unfortunately, I'm not changing my mind. That party is probably going to be filled with drunk and horny teenagers, I'm just not in the mood. I'm more focused on school.

"I'm sorry you feel that way, but I'm fine. Actually, scratch that, I've never been better. I finally feel independent. I'm not dependent on my boyfriend for anything anymore. I'm finally free to do what I want, to focus on me. No one else. Call me selfish, but I've never felt better." With that I close my textbook and storm up the stairs slamming the door to my bedroom in the process.

I flop face down on to my bed and scream into the pillow.

Why do people think they know me better than I do? If I say I'm fine, then I'm fine.

What I said was true, I like being independent. This is what I need, to be alone. I don't have Colten anymore and pretty soon I won't have Jackson either. I need to get used to it while I can.

I then feel my eyelids getting heavier and before I know it I'm trying hard to stay conscious, all attempts have failed.

***

When I come to, the sky is now dark. Along with my room. I turn my head to my clock on the nightstand and see it's only nine.

I get up to a sitting position and stretch all my tensed muscles. Feeling the need to relax I head to the bathroom and run the tub.

Squirting in my favorite lavender scented bath soap I then peel off my clothes and step into the steaming hot tub. My body relaxes as I sink beneath the surface, the water up to my neck.

I'm surrounded my amazing smelling remedies, Aromatherapy and some oils burn in the bathroom. I breath it all in, finally feeling relaxed.

Well, relaxed until school tomorrow.

Sorry for the long wait. I wanted to really think about how this was going to play out no just hope it was enough.

Thank you for all the likes and comments, I really appreciate it. The reads also ;)

Enjoy.

Like and comment :)