Kian Lawley Imagines & more

Kian Lawley > Abigail

For abigail-STYLES xx Hope you like it babe

"Fine then, if you can't trust me then I guess you won't need to worry anymore because we're over"

That one sentence; those nineteen words felt like a soccer-punch to my heart and here I am three days later with silent tears still flowing down my cheeks and onto the white pillow I was holding loosely in my arms. It wasn't only his words that were haunting me relentlessly; it was my actions as well. How could I be so stupid?

Kian was always out, as a matter of fact the longest he spent in our apartment with me was barely an hour and it was usually to sleep or to get something and yes it did annoy me but I knew it was about his upcoming world tour and his book release with Jc so I didn't make a big deal about him not being there for me. After all he had bigger things to do at that time and I didn't want to sound like a whiny and clingy girlfriend. Most of all I didn't want to sound like I wasn't proud of him because I was, I still am.

I looked up slightly at the car ceiling to stop the fresh tears from falling down at the memory.

It came to the point when he would leave for days and I was anxious as hell. He was on the other side of the city and barely texting or making general contact with me but one day when I the distance anxiety hit me harder than before a twitter page sent me a recent picture of Kian in a club grinding against a stunningly beautiful red headed girl.

I remember feeling a wave of emptiness and sheer anger. I remember saving that picture and hitting the 'send' button along with the words.

"Seriously? Well done Kian, that's two years down the drain! I applaud you for your efforts on keeping our relationship together 👏"

I vividly remember how I paced around the house with glossy eyes as Kian argued with me over the phone. During the argument rude and hurtful things were thrown around but the part that really got to me was the one sentence; the nineteen words. The last sentence he said before I hung up and let my emotions run freely down my face.

I watched the colors of the sunrise form in the clear blue sky from the backseats of my car, I was still laying sideways with a pillow clutched in my arms and a thin blanket at my knees. No, I haven't been living in my car for the past three days.

After the argument I packed a backpack half full of the things I would need for a few days and drove to my friend's house to stay with her/him. Everything in that apartment reminded me of him so I'd rather not stay there.

I stayed with Y/F/N for two days but I started to feel like a burden to her/him so I went out for the say to give him/her a break from my heart broken self. For some reason I found myself driving to the recently empty and abandoned pier; where me and Kian first met. I stayed here all day, just sitting on the hood of my car and watching the waves move forward gently and thinking about nothing other than about that picture, and how happy Kian looked wit . I was so out of it that I didn't realize that night had fallen.

Which explains why I'm in my car at the very moment. Slowly I sat up, a pain in my shoulder formed due to the odd way I slept for most the night. I leant my head against the tinted glass of the window for a brief few minutes as my eyes adjusted fully to my surroundings.

Suddenly multiple taps echoed through the small car, then a few seconds later a face I knew all too well appeared in front of the windshield and before I knew it there was a small click and the passenger door opened slightly and the lanky boy I've known since the O2L days slipped in and locked the car once again.

"Here me out Y/N" his voice was rasp, like he'd been heavily crying. Kian turned around to face me and I sat up properly, I couldn't help but let out silent tears. Dark circled complimented his dead eyes, his skin was ghostly pale as if he'd been shying away from the sun and dry tears stuck to his cheeks. He looked awful; he looked like how I looked a few days ago.

" Kian" I could hear my voice crack, "how did you-"

"It took me a few days to realize that his actually happened and I came here as fast as I could. Our apartment was empty so I called Y/F/N who –after yelling at me and threatening me- said that you left for the day to get your mind of things and I just had a feeling you were going to be here" he ranted without breathing.

There was a short silence but we couldn't take our eyes off each other. "I meant how did you get in my car" I forced a breathless laugh.

He held out a set of keys, "You gave me a key to your car and I know your number plate off by heart" I looked down at my fingers. What do I say? What do I do?

"I can give it back if you like" he fumbled hastily, trying to give me back my key

"Don't" I whispered. He stopped all movements and I took a deep breath.

"Look, for the past few months you've been acting distant but I thought it was about the stress of organizing you and Jc's tour and book. But that picture. You and the red head-"

"That picture was taken out of context. She's one of Jc's friends, we all went to a club and she was completely wasted and ditsy. She tripped over her own feet and landed on me. Y/N you have to believe me" He moved closer and caressed my cold hand.

"Kian. I – I don't know what to say or do" he shuffled closer so that he was crouching down on the floor of the back seats.

"Please Y/N. I love you. I genuinely love you and only you" he lifted up my hand towards his lips and kissed it.

"I love you Y/N" we both sat there in a long silence full of tension as I thought of mine and Kian's relationship so far on the past years. I made up my mind.

"I love you too"