fashion blogger, book one // phan (EDITING)

Eleven

We climbed out of the car when we arrived. The place seemed weirdly familiar to me, but I couldn't explain why.

With a careful movement, Phil took my hand. He looked at me as if to ask if I was okay with it, but I couldn't really do anything to keep him away from it, though maybe, I didn't even want to. So I let him hold my hand. "Come on, the Sushi is waiting," he said quietly and I nodded before I gave him a smile.

"It better is. I'm starving."

Phil chuckled and we walked over to the entrance. He opened the door and let me walk through, this time without the "Beauty first" that he had said in the coffee shop yesterday, but I could tell he was tempted to say something like that when I saw his smile. I mumbled a quiet "Don't you dare," and walked through, and Phil giggled a little before he followed me through the door.

We had to walk up stairs, and when we reached the second floor and walked into the restaurant, it suddenly all came back to me.

Back in 2010, Phil and I had visited my parents for a few days. They lived quite close to London, so after we left them again, we stayed in the city for three days. Phil had told me he hadn't really been to London that often, and since I basically grew up here, I decided I wanted to show him around for a bit.

One night, we decided to have sushi. And this was the restaurant we went to.

It wasn't the fanciest restaurant, but I remember that for 2010-Dan, it was. It had black tables and big aquariums with colourful fish in it. On the left were big floor-to-ceiling-windows which made it possible to look down to the street. There was a bar where you could sit, too.

"Good evening," a young waitress said and smiled at us.

"Hello," Phil said, "I have a reservation at 8:30 for Lester."

She looked at a computer screen for a moment. "Oh, yeah, Mr Lester. Follow me, please." She got up from her chair and walked through the room, leading us to a table close to the windows.

We said thanks and she smiled one more time before she left us alone.

I started to take off my coat when Phil gave me a weird look. "What?" I asked and laughed a little before I slipped it off completely and placed it on the chair's backrest.

"I should've helped you with that. Gentleman code and stuff." He smiled and I chuckled again. "Wow, what the hell. So I should've done the same thing for you?"

"I guess."

Phil giggled a little before he sat down in front of me, a smile still on his face. I didn't like how that smile made me feel. I didn't like how it made me want to kiss the corners of his mouth, and how it made me want to smile back.

"So, did you choose this place for nostalgic reasons?" I asked, and Phil looked at me.

"I often went here after I moved to London. It reminded me of you."

I wasn't sure what to say to that. Phil was still a mystery to me. If he had actually missed me all these years, if he had actually been hurt, too, if he maybe even loved me, although he never said so, why did he leave me? "Because I had hoped you would hate me." His words from a few nights ago crossed my mind again. But why would he hope that?

God, what was I doing? Why the hell did I think this date would be a good idea?

I mainly agreed to this date out of curiosity. Yes, I can't deny I started to feel... something for him again, although I wasn't sure what exactly it was yet. But I wanted to find out what it was about him. I wanted to understand him, and I wanted to understand why he did what he did.