Obsession

Ch 34 - Are You High?

I woke up to Ashton staring at me. My instinct was to hide my face, but he eased my hand away and held onto it. I wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but I didn't want to feel any more self-conscious than I already was. So I simply held his gaze. He had the slightest smile, and he whispered, "I love you."

Have you ever had one of those extremely emotional moments when you become so overwhelmed by how happy you are that it literally takes your breath and you can't help but to cry? I've felt that way on three occasions in my life: when I held my children for the first time, and the moment Ashton told me he loved me.

I had no control over the tear that escaped. And when Ashton noticed, he kissed it away. Before he kissed me on the lips, I said, "I love you, too."

He couldn't stop smiling enough to even kiss me properly, and we ended up giggling about it. Remembering that we weren't alone, we looked over at the other bed, and it appeared that Calum and Traci were still asleep.

I'm not sure what happened in those few seconds, but the mood suddenly went from lighthearted to dead serious in an instant. Ashton had an intense look in his eyes just before he kissed me again. The intensity translated into the kiss and I felt like if I didn't have him, I would legit explode. It didn't help at all when he slipped his hand under my shorts. I couldn't help but to let out a tiny moan, and he put his other hand over my mouth to stifle it.

He whispered into my ear, "Let's go to my room." I nodded, because I sure as hell couldn't speak.

Ashton was still dressed since he'd fallen asleep in his clothes. And I had slept in his shirt and shorts that I'd never given back. So all we had to do was throw on some shoes, and we slipped out of the room as quietly as we could.

When it was time to leave, I hated to say goodbye, but there was no other option. It would only be another month and a half until we met again. Though, I knew it would be the longest month and a half of my life.

I actually met Calum in the hallway on my way back to my room, which was a relief. I was afraid that I'd interrupt something when I got back, because, in our haste to get to Ashton's room, I'd forgotten my phone and key. Calum was looking mighty smug, so I knew I was right. As we passed each other, we didn't speak, but he held up his hand, and we gave each other a congratulatory high-five. I laughed about it forever.

Traci bombarded me as soon as I entered the room. "He actually gave me his number this time. And he apologized about that - whatever she was - after the show. I told him it wasn't any of my concern, but he said they didn't do anything, because he wanted to be with me. So, I don't know what to think anymore. He must like being with me, right? Anyway, I'm guessing you had a good morning, too?"

I fell onto the bed and closed my eyes, replaying the events of the morning in my head. "The best. Ashton told me that he loves me. Fucking Ashton Irwin loves me, T. I can't figure out what I've done to deserve this. It's insane."

"You haven't done anything but be you. You totally deserve it. I'm so happy for you, I can't even tell you."

We had a nice little sappy chat, then we had to get ready to leave.

After I gathered up the last of my belongings, I sat down on the bed and reflected on yet another unbelievable trip. It was really the best one yet. But I had some feelings of guilt, and told Traci so.

"I know we both had a great time, as always, but I kind of feel bad."

Traci questioned, "Why do you feel bad?"

"It's just that the purpose of our trips is to experience great stuff together, not spend a lot of time apart. And these past couple of trips have become something other than bonding trips or whatever you want to call it."