Devoted | Joshua Hong

19.

"Are you alright?"
"Yeah"
"How about your mum?"
"She's fine"
"Uhm.. Okay that's good,"
"Is there anything else to discuss?"
"I don't think so..."
"Good. I've got work. Bye"

We hung up. Joshua became so straightforward lately. He was probably still mad. But I don't even know where to find the fault.

A week had passed by, dad and Joshua's mum cancelled the wedding or more like postponed it. They said it was for the best yet they were still thinking. Nevertheless they were still together because of work regardless they had to answer the hows and whys.

Everything seemed back to normal. Including Joshua and I, back to strangers. Except that I still loved him, I don't know if he's still too but I won't make a move. After everything happened, I stayed on my own lane. But I couldn't live longer like this way. I wanted to settle everything.

Joshua's pov
Paris called me and told to meet at the cafe. I really hesitated to go but mum forced me to.

I came a bit early so it would end quickly. I saw her sitting at a table for two near the window. She just stood at the chair in front of her while holding her cup of hot coffee. She was probably being like that for ages, thinking.

Paris came back to reality as she saw me taking my seat in front of her.

She took a deep breath.

"I want to make things clear between us. I want to know what are we and why you're being so cold. Am I an enemy to you now?" She asked in a sarcastic tone.

"No. We're just acquaintances"

"Who accidentally loved each other"

"Nobody accidentally loved each other with people they don't even know,"

"And therefore, we are not acquaintances," she snapped.

I glared my eyes to the window beside me.

"Why are you so difficult on me?" She stared straightly into my eyes and straightened her pose.

"You know I love my mum more than anything. I just won't expect for you to make such a selfish decision"

"What selfish decision?!"

She raised her tone and I startled a bit.

"You-"

"Quit making me like I'm the only person to blame! I didn't even choose things to be this way. Oh come on, you're not the only person I need to love. Yes, of course, I fell in love with you that's it but I was the one who got hurt. Why? Because I don't want others to feel the same way. Why won't you even see me that way?" She pleaded.

It was hard to trust her. Yes, Paris. I still love you too but I'm hurting too. The only cure is to forget you. Mum is hurting too. If she's gaining her happiness then so will I. I can't have it from you.

"I hope this is already over. Don't even think we're getting closer,"

She mumbled a few words but I hesitated to listen.

I left her. Again.