Devoted | Joshua Hong

18.

[FOR EXTRA FEELS PLS LISTEN TO A VERY SAD SONG YEAH THANKS]

Paris's pov
The hall was fully crowded since morning. Everyone was looking forward to their performance. In fact, I was excited too. I haven't seen Hansol and the members yet. Probably they were too busy preparing at the backstage. 

Ever since last night, I just couldn't wait to meet Hansol as I've got exciting news. Of course I should text him or give a call but I wanted to tell him directly. Maybe after the show.

The show finally begun. It was super amazing. They drove the crowd wild as if the hall was about to expload. They did it.

"OMG WHO'S THAT WITH THE DARK BLONDE HAIR??? HE'S SO ADORABLE!" I heard a scream from behind.

My boyfriend. I became a bit proud of him getting noticed among the audience

Wait. Then I realised they were pointing out Joshua. Everyone knew who Hansol was. Crap. 

"His name is Jisoo, an absolute church boy. Might not want to get close with him or he'll be counting your sins," I interupted.

"I don't really mind," she was lovestruck.

"Okay but don't blame me if he wakes you up with holy water in bed and put up some weird rituals," I warned her.

Her eyes were in shock and I just laughed away.

The show finally came to an end. Everyone was exhausted cheering and jumping but they obviously did enjoyed it.

Then, the lights came out. I startled. Everyone was shocked. Was there a power cut? A sudden single spotlight turned on directing the middle stage. There, Hansol standing with a microphone and someone else sitting with a guitar. Joshua.

Everyone remained silent and waited for something to come. Gently, Joshua strummed the guitar after making counts. I knew the rhythm and the tune. It was a song I would always listen in my room. Especially on rainy days.

Was Hansol going to sing? Oh my God! He's going to sing in front of me for the first time? I front of these hundreds of people? I love you, Hansol. My little heart spoke.

The first verse was going to start in less than five seconds. I closed my eyes. Trying to get the feel of Hansol's sweet voice for the first time.

Settle down with me
Cover me up
Cuddle me in
Lie down with me
And hold me in your arms

His voice. Was incredible. Soft and sweet. He was so into the depth of the song. I opened my eyes. I almost collapsed.

Joshua was singing the first verse. Hansol was suddenly missing out of nowhere. I looked around. Everyone was hypnotised by the sweet voice of Joshua Hong.

Suddenly, I was being pulled out from the crowds. I resisted but I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't see who it was. The place was extremely packed.

Until we reached to the entrance of the backstage on the left side of the stage. It was empty. I turned my head to see whom it was. Hansol. Unintentionally, I made a big smile. We hugged ignoring the whole room and Ed Sheeran's song playing in the background. It was perfect.

"What is this? Another prank of you'll never hear me singing until you die?" I chuckled.

He laughed a bit and tried to act cool.

"Don't just laugh at me. Oh my God, was this your idea? You're so old school," I pat is chest. He just continued laughing until we both became silent.

And your heart against my chest
Your lips pressed to my neck
I'm falling for your eyes
But they don't know me yet
With the feeling I'll forget
I'm in love now

The song was still going on. And we were still staring at each other.

"I got something-"
"I want to-"

We both made a sudden stop when we spoke at the same time.

"You should talk first," he insisted.
"Oh no, you have a plan, you should start first," I resisted.

He took a deep breath and placed his hands on my shoulders.

"Paris, you know that I like you right?"

I nodded to agree.

"And we both know that we have known each other for about eight years. We're even bestfriends for eight years. I just want to tell you, I will always love you, whenever or wherever you are, and I want you to know that. This is kind of cheesy, I know I could throw up right now,"

I giggled and kept staring into his innocent eyes. This was the first time Hansol showing his romantic side to me. It was kind of awkward but I liked it. Maybe because I've known him for so long how sometimes he could be a jerk.

"And when I said I love you, I realised that... I just love you...as a true friend"

"What are you talking about?" I was confused I couldn't tell what he was trying to confront me.

"I know I'm that guy who could always be there for you, protect you and spend my entire time with you playing the walking dead, but I can't love you right as a man you want to live for,"

A tear flow down my cheek.

"Hansol, no. NO!"

"Yes! And as you know, the guy who is singing right now, the song you would always listen on gloomy days, loves you. That is what you are actually looking for. I can tell that you feel the same way too. I am your bestfriend Paris. I know you," he turned back to look at Joshua, singing.

"Listen to me Hansol-"

"Paris Ahn, please don't hide your feelings. As a true friend, I will always support you. I don't want you to live in choices. I am happy, and I hope you will be too. If you need anything, just tell me,"

He smiled at me and left to the backstage. At the same time, Joshua finished his solo performance. Everyone was cheering and the girls were screaming.

I quickly wiped away my tears. Gosh how many times did I cried this entire week.

As Joshua was leaving the stage, our eyes caught each other. He didn't smiled or the other way around. He was just emotionless and turned away. More kind of, broken.