Stally_ Life Is Hard

Little Steps

Ally

I have received an e-mail from my tutor. She wants to know why I have not gone to Uni in so long, I totally forgot to tell I was quitting. I ended up emailing back saying I would go to uni and talked to her tomorrow. I am a bit scared to talk to her but hopefully it will be fine.

I wake up the next morning, get dressed and walk with Frank to school. After smoking two cigarettes on the way to Uni, I get in and go to our studio to talk to my tutor.
It was a hard conversation and she almost cried, which was weird but it made me think. It did not made change my mind but definitely re think my decisions.
A lot of people said they missed me, which I think was really awkward since I barely talked to anyone.
"Hey Ella, do you know any music studios in west LA?" I asked to one of the few people I still spoke to.
"Not really" she said sad. "But...there is one here, two blocks away"
"What? Really? Do you think they want someone new to work with them?" I said smiling.
"Well they are always taking new people! You can try at least, would you like me to call them?"
"Well yeah, thanks!" I was always to shy to even call new places unless I really had to.
She spoke on the phone for a while and then she came back to me again.
"Well they said you should just pop in and even if they don t need anyone else they will tell   some other place where they do!" She said happy, "I really think you should give it a try! "
"Well thank you so much, I will definitely check that out, thanks Ella" she then hugged me and went back to her class.
It is hard for me to make this many decisions and change so much so quickly! Sometimes I just need to calm down a bit and think rationally. I decided to get a coffee and sit down imagining the sounds that nature makes or could make eventually. I relax and I think.
I see her again! I hadn't seen her in years! I can't believe she is back in my life. Her dark hair with purple tips, her sensuality walking...I can't let myself get caught into her, I will never have or be enough for her so might as well give up now.

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THANK YOU, KAT.