The World Is Ugly, But You're Beautiful To Me. (Gerard Way FanFiction)

Chapter 19: FanFiles Pt. 1: mychemely

WRITTEN BY mychemely AND REVISED/EDITED BY transferingworlds

I spent the rest of the day with Mikey and the others. Gerard had stayed with us until lunch, but when we decided to go to the mall he silently snuck down to his basement, Mikey watching with a sullen face. I really had a good time with them, with Frank teasing me every now and then, sometimes scaring the shit out of me and earning the laughter of the whole group. They were the best, but I was determined to include this happiness in Gerard's life.

My mom called me and for some reason said that I had to come home for dinner. I said goodbye to the group and was about to turn the front door knob when I remembered something, and headed in the opposite direction towards the basement.

Gerard was laying on his bed, a half empty beer bottle near him. He had tears in his eyes. At that sight, I impulsively ran towards him and hugged him. He instantly tensed up, but relaxed after a bit and embarrassedly returned the hug, crying on my shoulder. I patiently waited until he calmed his sobs. He finally looked up at me and sighed. "I will tell you my story if you want to listen."

I took a deep breath and said, "let it all out." I was very curious and thought that I was probably the first person who was ever able to hear his story. With a hoarse voice he began speaking.

"So, I had a happy childhood. I had my family, my brother, my friends, my grandmother and I was loved. My grandmother was my best friend, and eventually, she passed away. That was really hard for me. I loved her with all of my heart and realized that no matter what, all of my loved ones will eventually leave me. It was hard to accept, and I eventually "got over it", but it still lingers in my mind.

Then high school came. I got into the alternative lifestyle and so I started dressing in dark clothes and dyeing my hair. Unfortunately, many people just carelessly throw away people outside of the norm. I was gradually becoming more and more bullied until I was scared to go to school. When they started to do that to people who would just talk to me, I pushed everyone away and fell into a really dark hole. I started drinking, and it progressed until it was," Gerard stopped after his voice was starting to shake. I stretched out my hand and rested it on his shoulder. He looked down until he finally calmed his breathing. When he looked up again, he start back up, "until it was happening every night. When that didn't help I started drugs, and..." with that his voice cracked again and I wrapped my arm around him "I still do, I still have these feelings and these thoughts and I- I just don't know what to do. I don't know how to get out of it".

I hugged him again, letting him cry. I knew he still hadn't told me everything, but the pain that I could see in his eyes were already getting to me. I felt instantly sorry.

"You are worth it, Gerard. Mikey, Frank, and I, we all love you, we care for you and we hate seeing you like this. Accepting your pains is the first step, and I'm so proud of you for having the courage to do that. Start going out with all of us and get back into life. Don't let yourself feel and be so alone. Besides, you aren't alone, Gerard; you have me, I'm here for you." He slowly looked up and smiled a little "You are right. I really want to listen to what you said. I want a second chance, I want to heal, or at least to try" He stopped for a second. "Thank you" he finally said.

NEXT CHAPTER DUE: January 21st BY sarahthomasofficial

Happy writing! :)