Privacy doesn't exist ... (previously Love Sucks)

Part 14.... Forgotten.

I stare at the White envelope that lies in my arms with my name printed on the front, in Zacs handwriting.

Jake sits next to me watching my every move, I wonder if Zacs warned them to put me on suicide watch now I have dark hair.

Speaking of him he's made no attempt to contact me, it's been two weeks, two bloody weeks. Everytime I phoned up the house Kaden would always make up some pathetic excuse that he's resting or writing music and doesn't want to be disturbed.

His phone was constantly off or he didn't answer my calls, on the rare occasion that I stopped at the house he was out. I would always use the excuse to go to the toilet then make a dash to Zacs room, to check up on everything or scribble him a quick note which would no doubt be burned later on in the day.

No one let me in to his life anymore except Jake, he would bring me news about how he was coping after the first week, the fact that he thought he was going crazy for a while and refused to talk to anyone worried me at first, then Jake told me he went back to his normal self after a few days.

It was my every two days routine to send him a message saying

'Zac talk to me. I want to help you, you cant do this on your own. Just stay strong... For me. Nicki x' I always thought the kiss seemed slightly weird but a heart would definitely freak him out.

I decide to pull open the envelope and start to read the first words.

'Nicki, you don't know how many time I rewrote this letter. How many times I thought about burning this and pulling you in to my arms. I can't do that though, I can't be selfish anymore.

The last time I let someone into my life and let all my walls down it didn't turn out well.... And it effected me for a long time. I'm not trying to hurt you but please stop trying to contact me.

Your messages constantly remind me that I feel something for you... And if we're going to do this then neither of us want to start getting feelings for the other person. Now this is going to be the best option for both of us.

Just forget me, move on to some guy who can treat you the way you deserve. A guy who can be strong for you, not the other way round. I can't be strong for you with the way my life is at the moment.

You've seen what I do, I'm not sane... I have a problem and I don't want it affecting you. So I dont want a 'us' anymore, it's just me, it's just me fighting my way through my mess of a life. So I guess this is goodbye.

Don't spend hours worrying about me, because you shouldn't.

And many people say that If we want something we should fight for it, but I don't have the will to fight anymore.

Forget me, forget us and forget this ever happened.

You're an amazing girl Nicki and some guy is going to be very lucky to have you.

Just don't worry about people to much, you'll reach a point where you're that messed up that you have no idea how to fix yourself.

Bye Nicki.

Zac'

I have no reaction as I feel the breath stuck in my lungs, I can't breathe. It feels like a huge ball of fudge is stuck in my throat, blocking off all life.

He dropped me, just dropped me... Like I was worthless to him. Like I was actually worth NOTHING.

"Get me out of here" I mumble, Jake sits next to me and I begin to shake as the tears pour out of my eyes finally.

"Get me out of here!" I scream shaking. Jake immediately stands up and Joe comes running into the room.

"Nicki... What? What did he do to you?" Joe asks walking up to me and starting to pull me into a hug. I just shake more violently as I cry over the piece of my life that has been broken.

"Get. Me. Out. Of. Here"

Jake looks at me with intense eyes before pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialling a number. He mumbles something then sits next to me and tries to pull me into his arms.

"No, you knew what he was going to do, and you didnt even try and stop him" I shout at Jake who just pulls me harder, I struggle but he holds me against his chest harshly. One hand in my hair stroking it..

"He did this to me, I hate him Jake. I hate him." I sob clinging on to his favourite top.

"I know, I know. We're going to get you out of here and away from this mess Nicki. We're going to leave it. And just drop everything" He soothes holding me tighter to him, the only sounds are my sobs and Jakes soothing voice.

Promises broken and hearts split in half, what a great way to start a birthday.

........

DONT HATE ZAC.

Yay....this chapter actually came out really easily.

Anyway. Read, vote and comment.

xJustthebeginningx <3