A Deal (Bill Cipher x Reader)

Chapter 10: I'm Sorry, But Not Sorry

I smacked Bill right across the face, my palm stinging a bit from the sharp impact. As my hand left his cheek, he grabbed hold of my wrist.

"You let them die?! My own parents?! The ones who raised me and who I depended on?! Are you really that heartless?!" I tried hitting him with my other hand, but he grabbed my wrist.

It was then that I noticed that I was really crying. I didn't know who to blame for my parents' death: my parents for being selfless but not considering my feelings, or Bill keeping me safe but, again, not considering my feelings. It was my parents' fault for only asking Bill my safety, but it was also Bill's fault by not taking action.

I was so upset I grabbed onto Bill, not caring that he was a part of my parents' death. I only wanted someone to hang on to. He still held a firm grip on my wrists, but let me move my hands to grip onto his jacket. I buried my face into his chest, crying into his warm jacket. The cloth helped muffle me while I cried. Bill let go of my wrists and wrapped his arms around me, holding me close. One of his hands started stroking my hair while he started shushing, trying to pacify me. It did work, but I still had a hole in my heart that was now hard to patch.

"I'm sorry that I made you feel this way," he said,"but, at the same time, I'm not sorry. If I tried saving your parents, you would've died because I would be trying to keep you all from death."

He gently gripped my chin, bringing my head up to face him. His warm fingers wiped the tears from my cheeks, now that they have stopped.

"(Y/N), I love you too much to risk your life now. I was stubborn about this before, but it's clear now. I have more than a reason to keep you safe."

With that, he kissed me softly. He almost seemed hesitant, but adapted to it when he let the kiss go a bit deeper. It didn't last that long; just long enough to quiet me. He held my face in his hands even after we pulled away.

"Why did you keep me alive? What did you have planned for me?"

He sighed. "That, my dear, will have to wait. For now, just be glad I saved you."

I nodded at his grim reply, not sure what to say. Still though, that question loomed over me like a dark cloud threatening to bring a storm onto my head.

"Do you really love me?"

His eyes seemed to widen a bit. "Of course I do! I already told you this."

"But why?" I questioned. "I'm a human, and you're some sort of extradimensional dream demon. I'm practically nothing compared to you."

"Well, you know what they say: the longer something sticks around, the more it's worth," he shrugged. "I've been in your life as a shadow all your existence. You're of more value to me now than ever."

That's a wierd way of putting it, I thought.

"No, not really," Bill said. "It's the truth!"

I was surprised that, even in our dimension, he can still read my mind. Then perhaps he has his other powers as well.

What if he's tricking me by pretending to love me just so that he can get what he wants? He has all these great abilities, so why would he want me?

"Stop doubting me, (Y/N)!" Shit, why did I say that in my head? Bill just sighed.

"Look, if I didn't care about you, why would I have saved you? Your parents are dead, so my bargain with them was technically terminated. I don't have to keep you alive, but I still am. Why? Because you mean so much to me."

He does have a point.

He gripped my shoulders, looking into my eyes with a look of sincerity. This is the first time I've seen him look serious about something. He didn't seem cunning at this point. Nothing about him showed any trickery now. Maybe he was being serious.

"Just believe me when I say I love you. Please."

I was shocked at his plea for my acceptance. I doubt he would beg someone like this just for something seemingly simple. For a demon he's acting so human.

Part of me wanted to refuse purely based on who he was, but another part of me wanted to accept him and his love. The latter dominated my feelings towards him.

"Bill..." He was alert when I spoke. "I do love you."

With that, he moved his hands around my back and brought me closer to his chest, hugging me tightly. I hugged him back, closing my eyes and just enjoying this moment. I huddled my knees closer to my body, crossing my legs over Bill's. He held me for what felt like hours, gripping me tightly every so often. Before I knew it, I fell asleep.

Bill's POV:

Looks like (Y/N) fell asleep. Guess this is a good time as any. Focusing on her mind, I entered (Y/N)'s mindscape. Of course, there really is no need to, but some part of me can't help but be curious considering what just happened.

Damn, I really am concerned for this human. I hope she doesn't see me negatively.

Ooh, this is interesting...