Falling Backwards (Sequel to Moments)

Chapter 9: Forgive Louis

CHAPTER 9

*Janelle's P.O.V.*

The sunlight from my windows woke me up. I looked around and I found myself tucked into bed. What? How? And that's when it all came back to me. Last night. With Louis. How I broke down in front of him... and Taylor. I felt my face and I was crying again. I need a stronger emotional system.

I got up from bed deciding that it would be best to start getting ready for my morning shift, and that needs to start with breakfast. I went to the kitchen and found a note on my dining table.

Don't bother going to work today. You need some time to rest from all the drama. Don't worry! I will cover for you! You rest and please talk to them. You know who I'm talking about. Btw, Louis is really sweet and do I mention hot!

Lots of love, Taylor xoxo

Oh Taylor. I don't really know what she expects out of me though. I am not going to go out just to look for them. I've had enough of them for a lifetime. Just when I was about to toast my bagel, I hear a knock on the door. I go to open it, and the person standing in front of me was no other than Louis Tomlinson. I was about to close the door in front of his face, but he stopped me by forcing it open.

"What do you want Louis?" I asked.

"To talk. And I mean for real this time. No running away," he said staring into my eyes. "Can I come in?" I thought about it, and I caved in. There's no point in resisting when they're apparently not going to give up.

"Do you want anything to eat?" I asked. Don't get me wrong. I'm annoyed that he's here, but I have to be a good host no matter.

"No that's ok," he replied. I couldn't help but sense the slight amount of fear hidden in his voice. He's scared that I'm going to kick him out, just yell and scream at him in this talk we're going to have. Is it bad that I don't really care if I do?

Once I finished making myself a peanut butter and jelly bagel sandwich for breakfast, I went to join Louis in my living room, who was sitting there looking a bit nervous.

"Nice place you got here," Louis said taking a glance around.

"Thanks," I said nonchalantly. "Took me a year to get it." Awkward silence. "So you met Taylor?" I asked.

"Yeah. She said she was your neighbor? You guys best friends?"

"Yeah we are," I said taking a bite out of my bagel. Another awkward moment of silence. "Look Louis. If we're going to talk then do you mind-"

"What's it going to take for you to forgive us, Janelle?" Louis asks turning to me.

"Do you guys even understand what you all did to me?" I asked setting my empty plate on my coffee table. "When I had found out that my family was hiding secrets behind my back, I saw you guys as my next family, my next support system. I loved you guys so much. I thanked God everyday that I had all of you in my life. I defended you guys from the one person that caused me so much torture," I said turning to him. "And then, when I found out that all of you were hiding a secret behind my back too, it proved true to what Aaron said about you guys; being backstabbing, deceitful people who I shouldn't have trusted in the first place."

"You didn't have to run away though," Louis said.

"Yes I did," I said looking at him straight in the eyes. "Everyone around me turned out to be fake- fake friends and fake family, and I didn't want that anymore. You all turned out to be strangers and in that moment, I felt disgusted in my own skin. I thought of myself as stupid, idiotic, ashamed to be who I was. I don't even know if the guys I met were their real selves," I said speaking about the boys.