letter #3

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Dear Mr.Idiot,
I'm not going to try and make these letters all nice and happy and comical. Our childhood was anything but great and we weren't close friends either. Elementary school had ended and middle school had began widening the barrier between us. I joined the track team and your circle became wider. There was a jealousy in me that I never understood towards you. At first I remember brushing it off as not liking all the girls around you. I had some selfish claim to you, I already had it in my head that you would be mine. But now, I'm starting to see that maybe all these years I had created a dream around you. It's pretty ironic that dreams do end and when it's a child's dream their feelings are always changing course. I changed mine so many times when I finally got to your heart it became like a game. Do people play games with those they love?

Do you remember that day that we spoke again for the first time? Do you remember how you use to always tell me how happy you were that it happened? Well, what if I told you I created the whole thing.  I had threatened her that day, your cousin. I didn't know she was your cousin, I just knew you guys were too happy together. I don't like you happy at least if it isn't with me but even then sometimes, I guess I'm so twisted I want you to feel some pain. I'm a bit of a manipulator, a liar and a deceiver. Ironically, I've become- well I am everything that you hated.  Everything from then and now was all my doing, but I realize now I took it too far. I still hope you will forgive me, realize that the me I painted in your head can still become the real thing. Will you give me some time? Will you stay at the end?


Helia

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