The First Lost Girl

Chapter Nineteen: What Have I Done?

Rufio's P.O.V.
I sat with my back against a tree, listening to Pan as he informed the Lost Boys about the visitors.
"You all know what happens when adults set foot on this island." He was saying.
"They must pay the toll."
Chuckles ran through the crowd of boys and a few mumbled excitedly to each other. Excitement was also beginning to form in my stomach. This was the first pirate ship to come into Neverland since I had been here. It seemed like so long ago that I had been rescued by the shadow and brought to Neverland where this band of boys took me in.
"We'll have more patrols on the outskirts of the island. Luscious, Twitch, Sweet, and Devin, each of you take a beach and patrol it regularly, starting tonight. Felix, Blade, Nibs, and Logan, you'll be patrolling the outskirts of the camp. The rest of you will be preparing weapons. After all, it wouldn't be very fun taking our toll fee without bloodshed." He said smirking darkly. I saw some of the others do the same thing, including Felix. Ever since the pirate ship sighting he seemed angry. I wonder what's wrong.
"Alright boys! Pan called, getting the group's attention once again before dismissing them with, "let's play."
We all got to work. I went with Tootles and Beau to the side of the clearing. They were chatting with each other about the pirates. I grabbed one of the cross bows and made sure the aim was accurate.
"Do you think the Pirates would get close enough to the camp so that we would have to use these?" I asked.
"Nah." Answered Tootles. "They wouldn't dare set foot on the island, if they know what's good for them."
I stopped my work.
"Then why do we need to get so many weapons ready?"
"'Cause," Beau said. "What's the fun in getting treasure if you don't have to fight for it?"
I looked at Tootles.
"You mean that we're going to fight against innocent men?"
"They're not innocent." I heard Felix say.
He had finished patrolling on his side of the camp and had come to join us.
"Where's the sharpening stone?" Tootles asked Beau, who shrugged.
"Let's go find it." The both got up and left. I looked back up at Felix.
"They may have stolen things, but that's no more than what we're about to do. So even then, they are still innocent, compared to us."
"They don't just steal." He said scowling. I furrowed my eyebrows at him. Why was he acting this way?
"Pirates are thieving, killing, cheating, rats and deserve what's coming to them." He said tightening his grip on his knife, venom in every word he spoke.
"What do you mean? What's coming to them?" I asked, bewilderment seeping into my words. He looked at me, grimacing and scowling as I mentioned the pirates again.
"When Pan said bloodshed, he didn't just mean a few cuts and bruises."
My eyes widened.
"You mean kill them?!"
"They deserve it." Felix growled.
I couldn't believe my ears! The Felix I'd known for about a year now, the Felix who was always kind and gentle near me, was saying that it was alright to kill.
I sat there with my mouth hanging open in horror. Who was this boy I was talking to? Certainly not the Felix I knew.
"Why would you say that?!"
He looked down at me.
"Pirates are evil people who kill others without reason. So would it not be better to kill them first? Rufio, if we let them go on, they will kill more people."
"It's wrong to kill and you know it!" I yelled standing bolt up.
"It's not wrong if you're stopping those who kill!" He yelled back.
"Yes it is!"
"How?! By killing the ones who kill I can stop them before they take other's lives!"
I shook my head and started to walk away. How could he even say these things. Killing people was wrong. Period.
Before I could take another step I felt him grab my wrist and jerk me back over to him.
"Rufio it's not wrong to kill pirates! They're evil and must be stopped!" He yelled. He was trying to make me see the way he did but I couldn't. I wouldn't.
"Felix let go of me!" I yelled, clawing at his hand and trying to jerk away from him.
"Pirates are evil! All of them!"
"How would you know?!"
"Because Pirates killed my parents! In cold blood! They broke into our house and killed them! Leaving with our only valuable possessions, and both of my parents lying dead on the floor."
I had stopped struggling and listened.
"Felix I understand, what they did to you was wrong and unforgivable. But that was them. These people may be different!"
All the while that I was talking, Felix was shaking his head, and the anger in his eyes was growing.
"You don't know that. They are evil."
"No Felix! You don't know that!"
"Yes I do!"
"You cant just kill people for no reason! And we have none! All they've done is arrived here. They haven't even set foot in the island!"
I jerked my hand away from him.
"You can't."
Anger seemed to be pouring out of him. His eyes were dark and he looked as if he were just betrayed by me.
"How dare you even think about doing that." I said. "If you kill them then you will be just like them!" I yelled.
"Don't say tha-"
"I pirate."
"Shut up!" He screamed.
Before I knew what was happening, I felt a sharp pain in my right cheek. The force knocked me down and against a tree.
My eyes were wide with bewilderment as I reached up to touch my cheek. I gasped and jerked my hand away as just the touch sent extra pain shooting though it. Tears stung my eyes as I looked up at Felix. He had slapped me.
The look of horror was stretched across his face. He looked from me to his hands, mouth hanging open and shaking his head. He looked back at me again.
"Rufio, I didn't mean-"
I pushed off of the tree and ran from him. How could he? Felix...
Tears streamed down my face as I ran through the jungle, not knowing where to go. All I knew was that I wanted to be away. Away from Felix, who pirates had changed into a monster.

***********************************

Felix's P.O.V.
I couldn't believe what had just happened. I had hurt her. She was hurt. It was my fault. I did it.
She looked up at me from the ground. Tears were forming in her eyes. I looked at my hand. I did it.
"Rufio, I didn't mean-" I tried to apologize but she was gone before I could finish. She fled from me with fear. She was scared of me. And it was my fault.
"What have I done?"
I stood there unable to move. Tootles and Beau came trotting back over, happily chatting to each other.
"Hey, where'd Rufio go?" Beau asked.
I didn't answer him. I couldn't. My mouth felt like cotton.
"Probly went to look for the sharpening rock, but we found it. Tell her if you see her Felix." Tootles said.
All I could do was nod and walk off. But before I got to far I heard footsteps against the jungle ground, running this way.
"Pan!" I heard Devin yell.
I turned to see him running into the camp.
"Pan, where is he?"
"Right here, what is it Devin?" Pan asked, walking over to him.
"The pirates, they're on the island."
"Where did you see them?"
"East shore."
"Alright." Pan said smirking. "Let's play!"
As the boys pushed past me to get to their weapons, I stood there feeling sick to my stomach. The pirates were on the east shore, and Rufio was headed strait there.