Limerence | I

02. Sheet Music

I was anxious all weekend. I couldn't wait to take part in my first college course. At first, I was nervous because Professor Huck was to be directing the class and I didn't want to disappoint him but I soon remembered that I didn't the first time. He saw something in me; something that I didn't even see in myself. So when Monday arrived, I was ecstatic. My 30 minute train ride took three days to finally reach my destination but when it did, I hurried off of the train. I ended up getting to Juilliard with 15 minutes to spare. I thought it wouldn't hurt to explore the building as I had only been to the first level's performance hall. I wandered around each floor, visiting the campus' cafeteria, four dance studios, three recording studios, and four practice rooms. But when I reached the fifth -- where my course would be held , -- I saw a young man sitting on a wooden stool with his hands placed perfectly over the piano's keys through the glass door. I couldn't hear a thing through the it. Curiosity got the best of me, causing me to quietly enter the room. I closed the door behind me, trying my best to avoid the loud click.

It took me just seconds to be cast under the pianist's spell. His fingers effortlessly caressed the grand piano's black and white buttons. My lips parted, taking in each and every note he produced. He was so much better than me. His sound was was not shallow but it was filling. Although I could not see his face as his back was to me, I could feel that he lost himself in the music. Intermediate was an understatement concerning his skill level. His lengthy fingers moved quicker than I had ever seen but he made it look so easy. And even though I didn't know anything about the mysterious pianist, I had a deep admiration for him.

"Do you mind?" He suddenly came to a stop. He did not turn to face me but his voice was laced with frustration. I wasn't sure how he knew of my presence but I wasn't concerned about it. I was too intrigued by his ability. "Um, hello?" He finally made eye contact with me.

"Sorry. I saw you playing and just came in to be nosy. I actually have class in here." I explained. A heavy sigh escaped his full lips. I didn't stop myself from taking in his unique look. The first thing I noticed about the pianist was his hair. There was no way in hell that anyone could miss it. He had a head full of curls. And when I say full, i mean full. It was afro like but it fit is demeanor. He had youthful dark brown eyes that stood out against his medium brown skin tone. Despite his youthful face, his serious mannerisms made him appear older. He was undoubtedly a physically handsome young man.

"Well, make yourself at home." He spoke sarcastically, running his fingers through his jet black hair. Surrounding the piano were wooden chairs. I took the seat closest to him. He remained seated on the stool, concentrating on the instrument as if he was going through his piece in his head. I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip. I wanted to ask him a question but I was slightly afraid to interrupt his train of thought. He didn't seem like the conversational type. Or maybe he didn't like being disturbed while practicing.

"Excuse me." I interrupted anyway. He let out another sigh, raising one of his full eyebrows. I'm not sure why but a smiled tugged at the corners of my lips. In a way, I was amused by his attitude.

"What?" He responded rudely. I raised my eyebrows, almost taking it personally before shrugging it off.

"Mind if I ask what you were playing?" I asked. He slowly twisted his head to make eye contact once again. For a moment, he just stared at me. But it wasn't blank stare; it was the "you have three heads" kind of stare. My eyebrows furrowed inward, waiting for a response but I had a feeling I wasn't going to like it.

"It's Bach." He answered, almost dumbfounded. My cheeks suddenly began to burn. I looked down at the hardwood floors. "Please tell me you know who Bach is." He spoke desperately.

"Of course I do." I responded defensively. Even though I know of Bach and all of the other greats, I wasn't too familiar with their work. Unlike most other pianists, classical music didn't interest me. I didn't have the desire to learn the instrument because of them but because of the amount of creativity that comes out of it. And frankly, replaying the same pieces repeatedly wasn't creative at all.

"Mhm" He nodded as if he didn't believe me before turning his focus back on the piano. And before I could respond, students began filing into the practice room. They were all lively and excited for the day ahead of them. Unlike high school days, they all took seats as close to the front of the practice room as they could. I took a seat in the second row, not wanting to be overlooked or forgotten. Just a minute before class was supposed to begin, there were nearly forty five students seated. I recognized some of their bright faces from orientation. Others, I assumed, were in a higher class. When Professor Huck entered the room with a Starbucks coffee cup in his hand, an uproar of cheers resonated around the room. I just smiled.

"Thank you. I'll be here every Monday and Wednesday." He joked. I giggled along with all of the other pianists. His oversized glasses sat below the bridge of his nose as he pulled out a few sheets of paper from his black computer bag. "Alright. We're going to start by taking roll and getting to know each other. And by getting to know each other, I mean getting to know each other's musical strengths and weaknesses. I'm going to randomly pick a name out of this box." He held up a small black box that held small strips of white paper. "When you hear your name, I will provide you with sheet music. You will take your place at the piano and play your selected piece. Everyone will have a different score." He finished. My heart felt like it was going to escape from my chest. This could not be happening to me. Not on the first day. I began to breath heavier when I saw him blindly reach into the hat. And of course, my name was called first.

"Charli Shaw." He grinned, almost as if he was excited. I stood up, trying to hide my shaking legs. I walked up to Professor Huck slowly. When I got my sheet music, there was no title; just notes... tons of notes. I took my time getting to the center of the room where the piano was resting. I sat down just staring at the sheet. There was no way in hell that I could pull this off. "Get to it, Miss Shaw." Professor Huck said impatiently. I exhaled deeply before responding.

"I-I can't." I mumbled.

"Excuse me?" He asked. I wasn't sure if he didn't hear me the first time or if he wasn't sure what I meant. I turned to face him at the front of room. His arms were folded across his chest. My knees felt weak as everyone stared at me. I was so mortified that my feet threatened to run out of the room. I wanted to crawl under a rock and not come out until the year 2030.

"I can't read music." It was like word vomit. I thought I would feel relieved when I said it out loud, but the weight was still on my shoulders. There were a few whispers from the other students. Professor Huck sighed in frustration. I felt terrible. Especially since it was just the first day.

"Take a seat." He motioned toward the seat I was previously sitting in. When I was 10 years old, I stumbled upon my school's band room. Even though the school couldn't afford many instruments, they did have a piano. I sat at the stool and pushed random keys, a dreadful sound filling the room. I didn't expect anything to come from out of it. But my life changed when the band teacher sat beside me. She asked if I wanted to hear a song. Of course, I nodded my head. She proceeded to play an unknown song that was beautiful enough to bring tears to my eyes. And even though I said no to piano lessons from her, I snuck into the band room everyday after school to teach myself. So at this moment, I was regretting my decision to turn down lessons.

For the next three hours, I listened to everyone else play their scores without any struggles. I sat quietly embarrassed as I got sly glances from the other pianists, including the one with the afro. His intense eyes were burning a hole in my face. And as hard as I tried to pretend like I didn't notice, I glanced back at him. Surprisingly, he didn't look away. It wasn't a look of pity or even amusement. It was blank. I couldn't read what he was thinking as I could nearly everyone else. But I broke eye contact, carrying too much shame. I knew it would be a long year for Professor Huck and I.

{}{}{}

Song: Spotless Mind by Jhene Aiko