Point Of View 2 [*Do not read until you've read the same chapter of ATW]

Chapter 186 Man In The Mirror

*Trisha*

I'm trying to not only listen to the doctor but also calm my nerves. I'm on the verge of a panic attack and don't have time for this shit. I'm the one who keeps it together not the one who falls apart. I leave that one up to Moretti. 

Hospital settings have never been my strong suit. Not since Mom got sick. Yet I find myself in them more often than not lately with Nate's heart condition. Between that, the car accident that affected us all, the miscarriage... I've spent more time touring hospitals than touring around the world this year.

 I'm trying to keep myself together and  pay attention to Dr. Simms, but it's a hard task at the moment.

"You will be given a temporary Pacemaker ID card-" The doctor explains to Nate.

"A what?" I blurt out and Jonah shakes his head. 

"I'll explain it all later, ok? Hey..." Jonah notices I'm breathing a little heavier and my heart is pounding a little harder. "Take a breath ok?"

I nod.

"A permanent one from the manufacturer will be mailed within 6-8 weeks. He will need to carry this card with him always. And I mean always." The doctor says sternly. "You may be able to feel or see the outline of the pacemaker under your skin, which becomes less noticeable over time."

I think that was the moment it really hit Nate. Knowing that you can actually feel and see the outline of a pacemaker made it all feel real. He shields his face and begins to cry so I grab his hand and hold it to comfort him.

"Miss Banks. It says here you and... Mr. Marshall, are both listed as his emergency contacts?"  Both Jonah and I nod.

"He's going to need rest. Lots of it. Resuming his tour is medically out of the question. Not only that, you...or whoever lives with Mr. Hollan, will have to keep a good eye on him. His first check-up after he is sent home will be in two weeks. Then four weeks."

Medically out of the question? Sent home?  Yeah tell that to Richard!

"Then he will have appointments every three months for the first year and once a year after that, if all looks well."

This is life-changing. All of it. I'm gonna have to call Elliott. Richard.. This isn't some minor thing. This is something that is going to affect the rest of Nate's life.That means it will impact his work too, along with everyone employed alongside him.

A million things are running through my mind and I'm grateful Jonah is soaking it all in because I sure as hell am not. Jonah will need to explain it all to me later. I'm too much of a mess right now and we all know Nate sure as hell isn't paying attention. He's friggen doped up on whatever sedatives and painkillers they gave him in the ambulance.

"So, Mr. Hollan. Now's the time to decide." The doctor holds out a clipboard with important papers.

"I...What do I do?" Nate looks to me. Then to Jonah. 

"Nate.... We knew you'd need a pacemaker sooner or later." Jonah takes over. "It's time, brother."

The pen hadn't even touched the clipboard for a full second before the double doors burst open. Once Nate's signature was written the room became chaotic. A nurse sweeps in first, grabs the clipboard, and quickly scans through it."Dr. Simms needs him prepped now. Ten-minute countdown," she says, briskly.

Nate barely had time to process the whirlwind around him. The anesthesiologist arrives next, explaining calmly but quickly what would happen: the oxygen mask, the IV, what he might feel before going under. Technicians clips monitors to his chest, logging vital signs in real time.